Maybe some good alien intelligences are concerned about the disparity when it comes the way certain people are being treated and how it is affecting children.
Friday, April 24, 2026
Art class / younger people dream.
The universe or a dream is putting in my head that we met when we were really young in an art class and didn't talk too much. I was would just see you from across the room and then we got separated and I was like oh that person was nice. I really wonder what happened to him. But we didn't meet in an art class. Maybe that's just what could have happened.
Wow! I was dozing off again.
Episode one of the Thoreau documentary has been completed, so progress is slowly unfolding.
"Step Aside, Pops (Hark! A Vagrant, #2) by Kate Beaton"| Goodreads
Thursday, April 23, 2026
I'm confident I will go in the direction of my dreams and watch the Thoreau documentary within ten minutes.
"Step Aside, Pops (Hark! A Vagrant, #2) by Kate Beaton"| Goodreads
I'm excited I get to watch the rest of the Thoreau documentary because I drank coffee.
I'm going to drink the not overly caffeinated coffee occasionally because my uric acid levels were higher when I took my blood tests. And my big toe hurts and that makes doing planks problematic. And when that pain first started they said it wasn't gout, but I don't believe them. They didn't measure my uric acid levels back then. I think I found a better doctor this time.
I think I'm really different from all the people who've lived and died before, but I just have little commonalities with some of them. And the universe thinks I'm supposed to pay attention to their stories for this reason. One day I'll be dead, and then whoever comes after this person I am now will be their own unique individual as well.
Theoretically...
I would do more yoga for some people. I would start figuring out how to make my muscles denser too. I would try on more fun clothes and get more into artistic activities, to accomplish my soul's mission on Earth.
Well, wherever that comes from...
"Do you think if there are any children who are being incarcerated right now who are in danger of getting eating disorders on account of being so stressed out about their experiences, that if you teach them the right mouth breathing techniques, they can get better and more secure financial situations for themselves when they get out and grow taller and older and wiser?"
I would do it again.
I wonder what it would feel like to visit this place again now that I am older.
"Ralph Waldo Emerson House | 28 Cambridge Turnpike, Concord, MA"
https://visitconcord.org/listings/ralph-waldo-emerson-house/
Compared to the last time I visited it, when I was glad the tour was rushed, and I had to pee the whole time, and I felt rather irritated.
Anyways, hmmm, fascinating.
"For every ten pounds of fat lost in our bodies, eight and a half pounds of it comes out through the lungs; most of it is carbon dioxide mixed with a bit of water vapor. The rest is sweated or urinated out. This is a fact that most doctors, nutritionists, and other medical professionals have historically gotten wrong. The lungs are the weight-regulating system of the body."
"Breath Quotes by James Nestor(page 7 of 27)"
https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/74281999-breath-the-new-science-of-a-lost-art?page=7
Getting loquacious sir?
👩🏽🎨🎨🖼️💅🏽
"Ariana grande and Cynthia erivo are just one example of a larger more wicked issue."
andraberghoff
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DRndR1XkTVs/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
Elon sat next to me on two planes because he remembered me and was entranced by my nice treatment of his son years before at a museum and also I guess I treated him kindly enough, too. And he wanted to know if I had kids and he wanted to know if I thought he was attractive and there was a whole thing about not taking a gift from him in the gift shop back when I saw him at the La Brea Tarpits Museum, and he wasn't pleased. I wouldn't take the gift. And also in the airport he wanted to buy me something in the shop but he was a calmer person about it when I said no thanks, and he was just more chill and he put on his airpods s lot but also made conversation sometimes and he didn't seem that bad. And sometimes he seemed like he was just a kid himself. And now he's this weird phenomenon that he wasn't even like back then. And on the plane he acted almost like this kind of soft-spoken guy who grew up on a farm or something when he sat next to me and he told me about other projects. He sort of acted like he was just a car dealership owner or something. And he wanted to know if I believed in UFOs. And I feel like the blonde fairy girl on my t-shirt was an additional factor. I did not take his business card, even though at least one person who was sitting next to him told me it was a mistake that I wouldn't take it, and he wanted to talk to me more and said please wait and then I smiled at him and said I had to go. And later he dated Grimes and now he's the father of a huge amount of children by many different women. So I think there's multiple things to consider processing if you've had a certain amount of strange life experiences. And you can't just pretend you didn't have them just to make other people feel more comfortable. You're going to have to process them.
I almost feel like I did when I was 19 and packing my bags before I took my first trip down to Peru!
So much reading material!
This is only a fraction of it.
My cat doesn't think she's less cute because she's rounder now!
Why should people's children? And they also shouldn't be incarcerated based on which parents they were born to, either.
The aliens are messing with the YouTube algorithm.
"I convinced him to take the trance away. #movie"
Doupiaoliang
I wouldn't doubt that incarcerated children have a higher chance developing an eating disorder when they get out.
It's very stressful for them to have to endure that kind of lifestyle. People who have been through stressful situations are susceptible to developing stress-related disorders.
Now versus a long time ago has been on my mind lately.
I mean, consider that Spanish princess, Isabella Claire Eugenia, who was tall and thin, and was a big fan of Rubens when she was in the Netherlands, and he painted so many Ruben-esque women. Well nowadays, it seems like society believes the richer people deserve to have the look thinner eating disorders, and the poorer people deserve the look fatter eating disorders. I mean, I suppose that's not entirely accurate, probably? Because some poor people can have skinny genetics. But I still feel like there's a ring of truth to it.
Pretty interesting find after a little search...
Fiona Apple - "Paper Bag"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=BK30r_SIZ-g&si=gxIvlvfUIlE9eZs4
Is this song about having an eating disorder? I had thought of it more in terms of, like, emotional starvation, but the internet has suggested that it's also about having an eating disorder.
I listened to lots of adult music when I was a kid.
Just randomly, off the top of my head, one song that comes to mind is "Bang Bang, Maxwell Silver..." It was funny, and catchy. The adults would listen to it and laugh and the kids would laugh, too. But it's also violent! Hmmm.
Why does this one exist? (It's one that got stuck in my head recently.)
Sufjan Stevens & Angelo De Augustine - "Back to Oz"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=00f2kSnIxfw&si=xgtkNLHUilpYckDb
Do the kids listen to it?
If I'm supposed to consider things like this...
I am thinking of asking a few questions about, is it considered a good thing or a civic duty to remind others that some people are being treated very poorly right now because of the policies that are oppressive and sexist and racist, and if so, what is being done about that? I mean when does it come up, is it not until the kids read Anne Frank's diary in school? I'm just kind of confused sometimes, I guess.
I wonder what should I do about a few things.
If I was thinking about getting either a recorder, which I did play when I was younger, and "Green Sleeves" was fun to play on that one, or a flute, which I didn't ever really play, but I wanted to; however, I had to play the clarinet, and I also thought I might get a little string instrument that's not too expensive, like a ukulele, but then somebody who felt guided to help said "piano," and I said, I can't afford a piano and don't have enough space for one, and my mom played piano but I just sort of banged around on it and never got proficient at it, and then she suggested a keyboard, and I realized my grandma was always letting me play on a keyboard when I went to visit her in the summer, also today I walked by someone in the alley and he was playing on a keyboard...
Oh, but another thing is, the nice person who was guided by the "piano" suggestion also is spiritual and not particularly into politics and she recommended being like that, but then she had to leave my company for a while, and when she came back, she mentioned that her husband had been trying to talk to her about politics and I wondered if maybe the whole "don't want talk about the politics" thing is different for some people like for instance her husband, and maybe also for me; could it be?
Thinking about seeing more wildflowers and lavender farms soon, too.
"Discover The Prettiest Lavender Farms Around Los Angeles"
https://secretlosangeles.com/lavender-farms-los-angeles/
"Wildflower Hotline April 24 report"
https://theodorepayne.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/2026_4-24-WFH.pdf
I think I'm arranging a very enriching life for myself today.
I had a fun walk, and I liked taking my pictures. I did some exercise and I'm either going to clean or paint when I get home. I'm going to listen to some more music because it's fun when you know more of the songs that the artist might play at their live musical event. I do still feel somewhat guilty that I'm not technically earning any money at the moment, but I don't think the universe thinks I'm that bad of a person for not taking home a paycheck, and nobody's guilt tripping me about it.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
I almost forgot that I have to finish reading this book, so that's getting pushed up as the priority.
The Cost of Living: A Working Autobiography by Deborah Levy | Goodreads
https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/36820477-the-cost-of-living
Huh, never had heard of this book before.
"....Lol Stein"
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/280.The_Ravishing_of_Lol_Stein
Getting a little distracted...
"The Ravishing of Lol V. Stein, by Marguerite Duras (Anne-Marie Stretter #1)"
https://kansasbooks.blogspot.com/2024/07/el-arrebato-de-lol-v-stein-de.html?m=1
On account of patriarchical cults, churches, schools, governments, etc.
It feels like the lightbulb head guy lives inside of many women's and men's psyches. (Or so I thought to myself when I watched it this time.)
Garbage - "Push It"
Anyways, just a random thought to inform future creative choices.
Can you imagine discovering that there's been abuse in your family and having the older adults actually be really f****** adult about it instead of totally dropping the ball.
It's kind of like when you went ballroom dancing as a young person, and an old man dropped you on the floor and didn't say sorry about it, but the observant older women told you he was very bad to have done that, even as you tried to insist you were fine.
Be more like an observant well-aged person who insists on better treatment for fellow human beings as you make your journey in life.
Cute player 🎹😻🎶
Cat on piano keys 💖
"This is probably the most important video you will see..."
drapollo
Wednesday, April 22, 2026
At least words don't actually float in front of your face like this.
Gratitude!
"Women survive the apocalypse"
valmerza
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXclCn-AKNV/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
"The 'perfect' PCOS meal plan"
thepcosmentor and novum.pcos
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXdDwQYj0kp/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
Or maybe when you're in a deep sleep it is?
Not long ago I found myself in some words / woods, and I was actually enjoying life and feeling a little more cushioned after a spiritual person said I was correct about something, and that she had checked with her guides, and I said, I knew it, and it's kind of like a little drop of external validation goes a very long way sometimes, so I can be / will be prepared for more divine discomfort; life on Earth is never 100% comfortable, is it.
Or I might just appreciate some songs; who knows?
I may. I might make fun alterations.
It could be a grounding and interactive undertaking.
Don't traumatize the flamingos, Robert.
"Out of Africa | Robert Redford and Meryl Streep Soar Over Kenya"
Why is this what makes certain people rich?
"2:55 of RECEIPTS"
therealebjohnson
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXEgSTwgG45/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
I feel like my cat is constantly looking well. Happy to be alive.
I feel really enriched by having lived in various parts of the United States and I would like to visit many of them again someday, but today is one of those days when it's like, "Let's not put the ox-cart before the ox, man."
Kind of harsh. Do you think it's true?
"Their father and I agreed that we would live separately, but we would always live together in the lives of our children. There are only loving and unloving homes. It is the patriarchal story that has been broken. All the same, most children who grow up in that story will struggle, along with everyone else, to compose another one."
~ Deborah Levy
Page 13 "The Cost of Living"
"The Cost of Living: A Working Autobiography by Deborah Levy"| Goodreads
https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/36820477-the-cost-of-living
What a Rubik's cube. What a Rubik's cube.
This was good from the radio the other day too...
Collective Soul - "December (Official HD Music Video)"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=6exsatE-DUk&si=DJaBEyvrFyqsOA54
So it's good for me to have fun with it.
What if it's just not the right time for sappiness right now?
Some other time, maybe, but not right now?
"Stop asking for things you don't fully understand"
valenoffline
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DWZeCqsgfHn/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
Ever feel like you're possibly thinking thoughts that some people really don't want you to be thinking?
I don't really find the way things are going to be optimal at the moment because I don't really find the way things are going to be optimal at the moment because I don't really find the way things are going to be optimal at the moment because what's the deal with that?
I've heard the meals aren't the best.
"DHS responds to claims of hunger strike at Moshannon Valley ICE Processing Center"
This is just about paychecks and money for some people.
"Will Dispute Led ICE To Put 85-Year-Old Widow In Immigration Detention"
Probably everybody's been shaped by their own unique childhood experiences.
If there's a wide variety of children in this world and some of them are not as privileged as others, and it feels like that's something that gets in your feelings a lot, it would seem to me that the people who seem to care about what is happening to immigrant children in this country right now might seem like the best kind of community to be around.
Society can progress as people learn from their failures.
There seems to be a lot of failures to learn from, sometimes.
"One family’s ordeal in detention for nearly a year"
Here's another thing I thought was still pertinent to consider.
"90s kids are a generation conditioned..."
darlene.coach
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DVHCsvXCefA/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
Look at these seagulls.
"Seagulls using wind tunnel for leisure"
https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/s/M4FP5wf6Ij
They must really like it under there...
In this life, you can help me be a better servant to the divine feminine, please?
Making good use of the herbs they've been harvesting. 🌱
"cheese-topped picaditas for dinner"
Obduliah Ag
I gotta watch the Thoreau documentary again soon.
The first half hour of the documentary already talked about how Thoreau didn't step up enough with regards to the human rights of Native Americans, so I wonder what else they're gonna say.
Poor babies...what's going on with their fragile psyches?
"Rancor Baby" - The Onion
https://theonion.com/rancor-baby/
"Annie DJing at World Coin Thing"
https://www.reddit.com/r/AnnieClark/s/8EDZMA7LfC
"#momlife"
saint vincent
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DLlBpOaBSXz/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
Tuesday, April 21, 2026
This is a song I painted along with earlier.
Maybe I'll touch up more white parts and paint along with it again...
Counting Crows - "A Long December (Official Video)"
https://youtube.com/watch?v=1D5PtyrewSs&si=DdWlet2TkdImgskl
I like it. It felt good to listen to today. It kind makes me think of the other good songs by that band, and for me that was like music you'd listen to out behind a barn, off of a cassette player, in the '90s. This is a nice version too.
"Long December"
keenanomeara
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DOWaVo-iZAL/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
It kind of reminds me of when I visited the rainforest and staff at the lodge would play guitar and sing around the fire after the evening shift, although unfortunately I didn't recognize many of the Spanish language songs. But I think about this one: "Ay ay ay, canta no llores..."
I leaned into the weirdness today!
I finally painted the white parts. (Or some of them.)
And then I made a merry feminine junk journal with what I was given!
This is funny, but sadly, they cut the coda out.
It would have been funnier with it.
"Freddie's nonsense song from a room with a view"
@colacoke2111
Photo too meh to post.
Tiny cute bird on a wire, smeary window, very gray cloud cover. Bird flew away as soon as I finished typing that sentence.
Today can be an artistic and healing day.
I've had a good time working on some artistic projects today. And I ended up saying goodbye to somebody but it went very well. It was a very kind process. I have been seeing a student who is in training for a reduced rate for therapy about every other week and she has to take medical leave because she's in her first trimester of pregnancy and has been having difficulties with morning sickness issues and I do hope she feels better soon and I can feel somewhat happy for her but unfortunately I'm still not entirely healed about this issue and we both agreed it was probably better if I found somebody else to work with but everything was very kindly and nicely communicated.
Something interesting that came up in the session was she said she thinks it's valid if I have any bad feelings or or disappointment or jealousy. I said, I don't think anybody's ever said that directly to me like that. She has good psychology training maybe, huh? I said to her that I'm disappointed in patriarchal society when it comes to these issues. I said to her if I'd gone to a matriarchal church maybe there would have been ceremonies for all different kinds of women.
Maybe there would have been something in the service or in the community that said, sometimes there's people who don't have children and they thought they would, and they might feel sad about it, and we should help them. I said it would have been nice if I had been to a church that had a ceremony or a ritual like that and literally I never remember anything like that being taught to me when I was a kid; never.
I am also embarrassed, and really disappointed by how disrespectfully patriarchal society treats all kinds of women's bodies and girls bodies in general. It's f***** up. Anyways. I guess this was a good day for us to have this kind of conversation and to part ways in a fashion that was respectful and kind. She's a good person. Maybe I'll work with her again in the future.
Today, some parts of a poem about light were in circulation
inside of my head, so I went looking for the poem.
Was it this one? (When I saw the title I thought maybe it was.)
"The Inexactness of Light" by J. Brantingham, in "Slowly Through the Grove."
Actually it wasn't, but it was good to read the two of them together.
"Nautical Twilight" by J. Brantingham
DJs are just real, ordinary people, like farmworkers and artists and celebrities.
Music can push us into interesting realms! I have musical people in my family, too. 😊
All the good music they don't ever seem to want to play on the radio.
Sigh. 🎶🌹
Tori Amos "Blood Roses" Sept 24, 1999 - Las Vegas
It's phenomenal, honestly.
"this is hard to share..."
drjuli_larocca
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXN0MkYDKr_/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==
All the things people didn't want to talk about are actually getting talked about.
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