For health...

Healing healing healing healing healing healing healing healing healing ...be be be better better better ...woke up because of a sorrowful dream: A woman on a trail on a cliff, disoriented. She was crying for help, but no help was happening. Then, being told that a certain medical treatment was in the future...I was alarmed because I didn't want that. After a few minutes of slowly waking up, I thought, well maybe that dream was just because I read this article last night. In it, the woman contrasts how she was treated as a cancer patient vs. how she was treated when suffering from endometriosis. She says she got a lot more support when she had cancer than she did as an endometriosis patient. But then she did say she found a smaller group of women to support her. So, silver lining there. It seems that many women are taught to shut down about their problems. I'm sorry about that and I wish it weren't that way. But of course, men are taught this too. I don't know why we are like this, as a society. I guess it's because of fear? People will do a lot to feel like they can have control over certain situations. I had some moments of grieving. But then, I had some moments of reacting to the external world when these thoughts came out of my head:  for some (not all) the first thing you should do to succeed as a man is to find a support group of both men and women who are completely satisfied with your behavior and way of doing things. It's best if they in no way expect you to change or progress or do anything any better. This will turn out much better for you if you are a man working in a group of mostly male peers, with female supporters who don't challenge you or expect anything better out of you. Toughness and toughness and toughness again! Is that a way to survive? It doesn't work so well for everyone. My background / genetics have created a certain...life situation. A set of circumstances to be dealt with. When body was not being happy with me, I stayed in bed for a while. Eventually, I got up and went downstairs. Outside, I watched two sisters touching a rose. They were poking at it's thorns, Testing it. I was tired on multiple levels but I did go for a walk later in the day. It was rainy. I stood in front of a fountain as tears ran out of my eyes, but I also watched a man make giant bubbles and children in the park ran up and played with them. I did some walking. It helped. The walking is good. I will be better at listening to my body. Body, I must listen to you! I will be better about that. I will I will I will I am starting to be better about it. I can do it.