Oh god

Yesterday had some good points and now I want to go back and be living them again, instead of waking up in pain and sick. I do not wish my pain on anyone. I am sorry I suffer so. I think maybe I felt good and ate the wrong things again. I want I want I need I need health health health. I am going to the doctor on Friday. Yesterday's better points included finding a place to swim with warm water. That was the best.

I cry internally  because it's unfair to suffer on multiple levels. There's a physical level and an emotional level. There's men and women who have no idea what it's like to live like this because they have different genetics. They also don't want to know. It's scary...

I want a better life. I want my body to get better. I want people to become more compassionate.

I want my body to feel loved and appreciated. Thank you, body. I know you are not feeling well because of toxins in the environment and in food and even in water.  I know you are really sensitive.
I know I have lost many work hours and I know I need to do better when it comes to taking care of you.

It's like having a peanut allergy in a world where they can mostly eat peanuts. I think it's not exactly the same but similar.

I need to give you extra love and attention.

Help me find people who are caring.

I am part of the earth.