You are in a place and you like being there, but some of the behavior feels disrespectful and unnecessary. This makes it unwelcoming. But keep in mind that if you are a woman, you can still excel in this environment. As long as you don't upset certain people, and you continue to give them compliments and make excuses when they act like bullies, you are pleasing them. You are "the right fit" for them. You are almost like "one of the guys." You are a good girl. You should value them and what they value the most.
If they behave in discriminating ways, you should ignore it or deny it happens. Definitely don't instigate a conversation about it. Because would you rather have a conversation about how to make things more equitable? Or would you rather just tell a joke and let things slide and bask in feeling accepted?
This is just how they do things here. This is just the way it is. Do you really want to challenge them on that, especially if they won't like it and it could have negative repercussions? Isn't it just better to go along with how they do things, won't you be rewarded for doing so?
Another feature: Bonding over a love of excluding others who don't think the same way. Let's get rid of that one with different opinions. Are you better off now?
Do you want more women to work in this discipline? Or do you prefer things stay the way they are because it suits you just fine?
Message: We don't discriminate against all women. We just discriminate against certain kinds of women.
Caveat: "We" could be men but also some women.
People used to say "I'm not a feminist, but..." a lot more in the past.
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