Mind/body/emotions

in the midst of illness:

Wend way downstairs, fiddle with remote and feel like a four year old. It's the first time in days I've done anything outside of my room besides prepare tea or food. Do I even have the energy to watch a PBS documentary? It's supposed to be about the "Earth's Natural Wonders." I want it to be relaxing. Then I see it's focused on men and boys doing something with a hive. I get a very bad feeling and start coughing, muttering "I need help," as I run into the bathroom and crouch over the toilet.

After I've recovered, I complain, but wonderful friend's eyes gleam as he says, "Oh, have you heard about that? It's famous! It's where the boys have to put on a glove of stinging insects and it's very painful, and if you survive, you become a man!"

Well, that sounds horrible.

There's a tin of smoked oysters on the table. (Oysters are high in zinc.) I am cautiously optimistic I might be able to get them down. What an odd choice, if you've been sick??? But I think that was less to do with nausea then with coughing so hard it triggered some sort of gag reflex. I eat the whole tin of oysters. I feel so grateful that they have been bought for me, and that I'm going to successfully digest this zinc-rich food that tears come to my eyes.

Later on, tempted by the sunlight to go outside for a little bit. (First time that's happened in days too.)

~~~~~

Brains are different. We are all uniquely wired. I was told I suffered from a bruise on my head as an infant. Also, I got knocked over onto a concrete floor by a busy nurse who did not care a whit as she stepped over me...("Never have a baby in a military hospital!") Maybe this has affected my brain. Math skills: not so great. Intense creative associations / memories / emotions / visceral connections to historic figures that have lived before, as if you've seen things through their eyes: AWESOME at that. But where in society could you go up to be recognized for that? Possibly the Arts, if it doesn't put you into deep therapy because it's so...different from what most people seem to experience? And yet, maybe some others do experience it or similar things also? And open-minded people can roll with it.