*****

M.I.A. ~ Borders

M.I.A. ~ Matahdatah Scroll 01 "Broader Than A Border"

Edit

Okay, maybe here I was getting a little confused. Technically, people who pick food in this are probably mostly migrants...

http://testtube.com/testtubeplus/is-the-united-states-the-best-country-for-refugees

Sometimes I get Tom Petty in my head: "You don't have to live like a refugee."

I tutored a kid who couldn't go back to his own country, and I didn't know it at first. Later, his mother explained more to me. They can't go back to see their family.

I like it

http://www.openupspace.com/openup-articles/meditation-simple-guidance/

Schools

Sometimes where you end up going to school surprises you. I fully intended to go to an alternative state school and ended up at an expensive religious college, where I met the man I have lived with for the past five years, who I crossed the country to live with, and we have been friends for nearly two decades. We both have student loans, but his were more than mine. I would not have met him if I had gone elsewhere.

Mystery

I don't understand how some people can fall back into old manipulative patterns so easily. And it's like, these people aren't necessarily manipulative at their core, or all the time. At their core, they can be very plain and honest. But just a few little things skew a certain way, ever so slightly and 1-2-3...that old, manipulative pattern starts happening AGAIN.

Tonight equals F

I went out for coffee, I got an expensive traffic ticket. I am going to bed. No. Wait. I am getting work done. That was an expensive solution.

Before I make that desperate dash

to the coffee shop and try to get sh*t done (and I'm almost weeping, b/c my laptop is too fubar to use coffee shop wifi, or even at home wifi, and I need to use the internet) I must confess not quite getting all the highly-educated-woman hate for Thoreau. Don't know why kids and certain smart women of his time fancied him, if he was that bad. Aren't there other things to hate on more constructively? Like how kids are picking our food and people are getting poisoned by pesticides? Or how women's reproductive rights are being threatened? Is hating the old prig just pleasurable? Anyways. I can't get my work done. I hope the coffee shop helps!

Oh Mother Mary
I Beseech Thee
With All My Charming Feminine Wile
Help Me Get The Studying Done Tonight
Seriously, I Need This.

AAAAAAAAA
MEEEEEEN

P.S. Mary is also hot.

Our Lady of Sorrows by Tianna (Mallett) Williams

Pretty!!!

Elle King in "Ex's & Oh's"

~~~~~

Little girl in Elle King's "Good To Be A Man"

All circular and subtle again

http://loscuatroojos.com/2011/08/13/my-sense-of-humor-and-an-example-of-why-im-going-to-hell/

Thoreau made jokes. People actually laughed. AMAZING.  

Before it appeared as the first chapter of Walden, Thoreau delivered “Economy”—“dry, sententious, condescending,” too long, is how Schulz describes it—as a well-attended lecture at the Concord Lyceum. According to a review that appeared in The Salem Observer, the lecture created “quite a sensation.” It “was done in an admirable manner, in a strain of exquisite humor, with a strong under current of delicate satire against the follies of the times.” It kept the audience, the reviewer notes, “in almost constant mirth.” After attending one of Thoreau’s lectures, Emerson recorded in his journal, perhaps enviously, “They laughed till they cried.” 

Where are the jokes? In plain sight. Schulz even quotes some of them, for instance in this passage, on his objection to doormats: “As I had no room to spare within the house, nor time to spare within or without to shake it, I declined it, preferring to wipe my feet on the sod before my door. It is best to avoid the beginnings of evil.” That last sentence is a parody of a Puritanical sermon, not a sincere emulation of one, just as Thoreau’s fastidious bookkeeping is a satirical parody of business.

~ https://newrepublic.com/article/123162/everybody-hates-henry-david-thoreau


 

Almorzar

I want to go back here sometime: Cafe Maji. It's in the upstairs of a gym. It's weird and cute. They're all about texture and crunch in their sandwiches. It has a beautiful view of the mountains. The staff were really nice to a migrant worker who did not speak English.

It's hard

You can't be a pimp and a prostitute too

~ Icky Thump

Moods

Sylvia...

http://colourthysoul.tumblr.com/

"Sylvia's friendship with and attraction to Geoffrey Moor and Adam Warwick replicates Louisa's feelings for her father's friends Emerson and Thoreau."

~ The Portable Louisa May Alcott

~~~~~

The Portable Louisa May Alcott

Henry...

Good morning

https://newrepublic.com/article/123162/everybody-hates-henry-david-thoreau

Lidian

http://www.nytimes.com/1987/11/29/books/dear-mr-emerson.html

lang u age

kin dof psych icno tes byk indof psy chic folk sappro ved byt he an gelch eer lea ders ofyo urfa vori tests ecrets

Holy Red Dr

essness. A lot of women. Like. That. Song. And dudes, too.

Deee-troit!

Poorest city; best music.
Steady as she goes...
Michigan October is the coldest it will ever get here in the winter...

I WILL learn to play a string instrument

Jason Vieaux And Yolanda Kondonassis play "Elysian," "Spirit of Trees" (4 minute marker), other stuff...

I have assignments

I have to negotiate words and sort pictures and accomplish things.

Sightseeing

This was interesting, too.

http://www.catchnews.com/culture-news/teju-cole-s-instagram-feed-just-gave-us-a-masterclass-on-understanding-human-behaviour-1439988410.html

Silently imagining

how M. White spent Thanksgiving...

God, I am thankful not to be in front of a camera...

That's life

High was the solitary hike with gorgeous views in the a.m., low is the killer sinus headache which cries out for supplements, tea, ibuprofen, a nap....wait...are they actually kicking in...

I had an image of a smiling blond woman wiping dishes...I had an image of a cat sticking her hind leg in a dish of water as she drinks out of another dish...

Hmmm 2

http://www.gq.com/story/sex-strikes-spike-lee-chiraq

http://www.theatlantic.com/notes/2015/11/the-sex-strike-myth/417882/

Hmmm....

This show sounds interesting...
http://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2015/nov/27/jessica-jones-shattering-exploration-addiction-control

Poem humor

From "An Odd Moment" by Gary Soto (also mentioned here...the version I read in Fall 2011 Huizache did not have the "fossil" line):

"I was reading
From an old book of poetry
When the 9th grade class of Catholic girls
Began to yawn, each of them
A little bird wanting to be fed
Something other than sweet John Keats.
To save the moment,
I asked, "Ladies, what's 
Your favorite dessert?"
None raised a hand.
Some moaned and reached
Into their sleeves for cell phones.
How long would it go on like this?"

From Etsy ~ TevaKiwi

Unconventional

Guys, do you want to be friends with someone of the opposite sex? Are you tired of boring, vanilla-flavored friendship origin stories? Well, why not pick a quirky person and just follow her around for weeks as you complete work on your special soap box collection. Or maybe it could be a guy, I don't know. Whoever they are, just keep trying to talk to them so much they zone out and get actually amnesiac anytime you come near them.

It will work great for you! Promise.

Black Friday Writing Prompt

Jack White and The Joy of Talking A Lot.

Shiny happy people reading books

Should learn to play guitar and sing Sweet Sangria on impulse.

Plus De Los Amores.

Heart art stuff

smart heartbreak fear love woundedness sincerity scarcity control nervousness nausea self censure self denial self absorption drama no drama karma pity jealousy relaxation temptation on the edge retreat renewal well of loneliness desperation admiration contentment peace joy pain hunger thirst trust search sigh try get by on the fly do or die hope and lie will to fly or sleep the sleep of a thousand sleepy dreams dance discover disconnect reconnect optimism pessimism growth humor horror cry yawn disperse arrange words eat interact observe record tell stories do it again

Final Distraction

23x Aubrey Plaza...

I am going to relearn how to knit now.

Art / Apollo

I decided to mention this is a good song: Apollo's Frock

It's more than I would be able to compose at the moment. Mine would be, like "Apollo! Stop being such a dick!" Or even worse, "Apollo! Suck my..." (No you don't want to say that. Do you? No, you don't. But the thought was there! Ha ha. Funny. UGH. Hmmm, this apartment is weird. It feels like people are stomping around upstairs. But it's next door. The walls are thinner than in the old place.)

"Apollo's Frock" is about multiple things going on in multiple places, all over the world. "Apollo's Frock" also has a fan video (also more than I would be capable of at the moment.)  Here it is:

Apollo's Frock

Maybe I will do something calming, like knit a dishcloth. I haven't done that in a while. It sounds like a nice, soothing activity. I really liked one that I made a while back with Sugar & Cream blue & white denim yarn...Hopefully I haven't forgotten how to knit...

http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/checkered-dishcloth

Another thing

After I had a nap and woke up and went for a walk, my throat was all "DAS THROAT" feeling again, as if I'd been screaming or something. (I had not, in fact, been screaming. I'd only been taking a nap.)

BUT!!!!

After I complain a bit (oh, so unattractive! complaining about sexual assault and rape culture! what a drag!)

WELL, GUESS WHAT

~~~~~~

THE THROAT FEELS SO MUCH BETTER NOW.

GO THROAT.

https://mysticyogini.wordpress.com/2014/02/19/a-kundalini-yogini-view-the-throat-chakra-vishuddha/

pinterest

Lovely, bitter, cranberry

I got a recommendation for making cranberry sauce with 3/4 less sugar than usual, which I plan to try. I drink unsweetened juice sometimes and I have a tolerance for sour and bitter.

Another recommendation: you should start an exercise regimen (for better health, better mood, etc.) Doesn't regimen sound military? Like "regiment," eeesh. But okay. Maybe a "regimen" is more effective.

Speaking of which...That exercise magazine I received with the covergirl who is on GOT had a section where she was asked about the show's misogyny, surprisingly. Let's not kid ourselves, her job is not to comfort survivors vs. support a show that gets boycotted; her job is to look hot and sell magazine covers and make $$$ for herself and other people (and I guess be a good actress) so really, does anyone expect her to make any really insightful comments about that?

 Other "women's health issues":

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2009/09/03/wearing-your-weight-as-armor/

http://rhrealitycheck.org/article/2013/09/18/regaining-control-after-sexual-assault-through-fitness/

But I guess those don't exactly sell magazine covers.

~~~~

 "Natalie has joking lobbied for "more dick" (blah blah blah blah blah, page 106 of the December 2015 print issue of Women's Health.) 

~~~~

"It was all so messed up,” Turner, 19, told Entertainment Weekly. "It's also so daunting for me to do it. I've been making [Cogman] feel so bad for writing that scene: 'I can't believe you're doing this to me!' But I secretly loved it."
http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/claire-mccaskill-leads-charge-to-boycott-game-of-thrones-im-done-2015205

And magically

No schizophrenic ever panhandled in front of the yoga studio again. They were always charming. With songs on their lips and smiles on their faces...

Imagined scenario

Q: Will you pay attention to me if I am am underpaid worker who does not speak your language? A: Mmmm...not so much... Q: Okay, good to know. We'll see what my pimps say when I get older...

Food can be...fun / cyclical?

http://markbittman.com/humble-paella/

http://markbittman.com/too-hot-to-grill-try-the-slow-cooker/

http://www.amazon.com/Mark-Bittmans-Kitchen-Matrix-Possibilities-ebook/dp/B00TCI48QI

~~~~~

By Becca Stadtlander: http://markbittman.com/a-walk-on-the-wild-edibles-side/

and tobacco, MEH

http://firstfocus.org/blog/our-favorite-daily-show-clip-nicoteens-and-tobacco-child-labor/

http://www.thenation.com/article/why-are-children-working-american-tobacco-fields/

Online holiday shopping?

The Workers Who Bring You Black Friday

My life as a temp in California’s Inland Empire, the belly of the online shopping beast.

By 

Gabriel Thompson

From Thenation.com/article/holiday-crush/

"For warehouse temps—like the crew of thirty folks I’ve joined at Ingram Micro—annual median wages come to a mere $10,067. Even a typical farmworker makes more."

This is so Thanksgiving

https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/oexjv/thank_you_jesus/

Grateful for my education

I went to an $$expensive$$ Jesuit school in the '90s. Even back then, I had exposure to feminism in my classes. I also had exposure to students organizing for farmworker rights (including students whose parents had been farmworkers) and "liberation theology," which I was not aware of prior to attending that school. I still haven't come close paying off my student loans, but that's not the worst thing, really. Community college is great for many reasons, but it is not exactly heavy on feminism, farmworker rights, or liberation theology.

To investigate

Juice
http://foragerproject.com/forager-juices/

Music
http://remezcla.com/music/album-review-moldes-aguas-de-marte-peru/

Feminism
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/06/books/review/you-too-can-have-a-body-like-mine-by-alexandra-kleeman.html?_r=0

http://www.avclub.com/review/another-hiking-discover-yourself-story-girl-woods--224689

Books
http://www.latimes.com/books/jacketcopy/la-et-jc-aspen-matis-wild-woods-20150913-story.html

http://www.slate.com/articles/arts/books/2015/08/you_too_can_have_a_body_like_mine_by_alexandra_kleeman_reviewed.html
 

Oh music & media

On the way back from the store, I got curious about some music and the DJ, I remembered her from last night...I guess she got in a twitter fight from her comments about not being a feminist and then playing "Cold Hard Bitch"...anyhooo...I needed to figure out how well I could understand that song by the group in Peru ("Vinylchrist") so I found another version (live) and well, my Spanish sucks, but bits and pieces come back...and as they are talking about the song and I'm trying to assess my comprehension skills I am staring at the keyboard which says? what on earth does it say? It says Roland and Juno-D? does God love to mess with my head? Sometimes I must ask this question. I also took note of the "Roots" song, as a girl who loves this group was the only one to seek my assistance the day before Thanksgiving...and I also found this song meme: 

 

I was thinking about exercise recently, but how I would like to do my own kind of exercise and not a lot of military type stuff...and I get this today (didn't order it): Natalie Dormer, Game of Thrones / marathon runner...(and about feminism http://www.womenshealthmag.com/life/natalie-dormer-on-the-f-word-sexism-misogyny-and-marriage) and also this movie came in the mail (to watch on the laptop probably since the TV is more or less unwatchable right now) and I am wondering if there's going to be some kind of Black-Friday-sale cave-in. 

Princess Mononoke

100% new song

Clicked on for the picture...


Moldes ~ Vynilchrist

Mas hermosa

Susana Baca ~ De Los Amores

M

Magnificent

Menstrual

Misery

Mother

Meliorate

Melody

 

queenoftheamericasguild.org/

Misery something something

http://time.com/money/4125877/misery-index-economy/

A flame song

Enciendete candela (Florencia Bernales)
Enciendete candela (Susana Baca)

A moon song

Luna llena by Susana Baca

I don't know why I always think the last name has a V; maybe it was written that way on a mix tape...

When in retrograde

I guess that sometimes there is a self that does not want success in the sense of making the money, winning the awards, getting followers to stroke my ego, etc....I get disgusted by the idea...as if that happened once for me also, and it is part of what made things out of balance...it's too seductive and it is part of why the "haves"can so easily ignore exploited people who make their food and clothing available to them...it seems like some people are only demonstrating that they care about the suffering who are convenient for them to care about...like a victim of war in a far off land...if you have no guilty connection to them it is more convenient for you...but you are in a system of consumption and exploitation and you refuse to acknowledge your role in that system and how you constantly make others invisible...I am a consumer in that system, too...I feel like I get frustated and stuck, so I will not be "successful" in a sense because it is not an option for me this time...who knows, maybe that is not the best way to be, according to some people...but there it is...

Intrigued by...

 

Lotuscandles.com

Lightness and traffic

Today

piquant

Foster babies
Leaf / deer

Be Mothers, etc.

From The Female Man by Joanna Russ:

"Anyway everyboy (sorry) everybody knows that what women have done that is really important is not to constitute a great, cheap labor force that you can zip in when you're at war and zip out again afterwards but to Be Mothers, to form the coming generation, to give birth to them, to nurse them, to mop floors for them, to love them, cook for them, clean for them, change their diapers, pick up after them, and mainly sacrifice themselves for them. This is the most important job in the world. That's why they don't pay you for it. 

I cried, and then stopped crying because otherwise I would never have stopped crying. Things come to an awful dead center that way. You will notice that even my diction is becoming feminine, thus revealing my true nature; I am not saying "Damn" any more, or "Blast"; I am putting in lots of qualifiers like "rather," I am writing in these breathless little feminine tags, she threw herself down on the bed, I have no structure (she thought), my thoughts seep out shapelessly like menstrual fluid, it is all very female and deep and full of essences, it is very primitive and full of "and's," it is called "run-on sentences." 

Very swampy in my mind. Very rotten and badly off. I am a woman. I am a woman with a woman's brain. I am a woman with a woman's sickness. I am a woman with the wraps off, bald as an adder, God help me and you. 

II. Then I turned into a man."

~ page...(oh shoot, closed the book / forgot to mark it....)

Have haven't having haven hove...

Cl-cl-cl-click at own risk...

Lights...

Already feel better.

Mejorar

Today was pretty much the worst day of this month. Maybe year. Wine is a negative depressant at times. If I feel that bad, I do not need art. Much better to go get fresh air.

Seriously, what a terrible day. Terrible! Go away, or pick up pieces, make something new, make something better.

it still seems

like ignoring the plight of people who literally make your day-to-day activities possible is not a good idea

transitions

sometimes can be pretty disgusting
or pretty like little bits of crystals falling in sand pile everywhere

It is so

Harry Mancini's "Love Story" can go with Immortal Technique's "Dance With The Devil." Harry Mancini's "Love Story" can go with anything...

Nuns work

http://metro.co.uk/2015/11/19/nuns-pose-as-prostitutes-to-rescue-sex-slaves-from-brothels-5513421/

M & M

Michigan & Mexico

http://www.freep.com/story/opinion/contributors/2015/11/14/migrant-farmworker-transportation-michigan/75754982/


http://www.thenation.com/article/the-maquiladora-workers-of-juarez-find-their-voice/

Issue sandwich

"But why are you talking about diabetes and farmworkers? You're not an oppressed farmworker." Okay then!

http://www.today.com/video/amy-schumer-talks-body-image-women-in-the-workforce-545699907655

http://variety.com/2015/scene/news/viola-davis-rape-foundation-stuart-house-1201645721/

http://www.ohpluckthis.com/hirsutism-avoidant-personality-disorder/

Food distractions

“Latino farmworkers harvest much of our fruit and vegetables, yet they face obesity and diabetes rates much higher than the general population,” said lead investigator Marc Schenker, director of the UC Migration and Health Research Center and the Western Center for Agricultural Health and Safety, and a distinguished professor in UC Davis’ Department of Public Health Sciences.

~ http://news.ucdavis.edu/search/news_detail.lasso?id=10920

Holiday pears are delicious

And beautifully packaged.
Thank you, Harry and David.

My box says "Grown with care by Harry and David."

What a lot of work for two men from 1914 to do all by themselves...

~ http://lickmyspoon.com/events/harry-david-the-people-behind-the-pears/

Où était mauvause génie...

Edith Piaf had more lovers than the film could detail!

And this, too...

"The teenage Edith kept louche company in Pigalle, where she now settled — if, indeed, “settled” can be said to be the right word. There she took up with Simone Berteaut, 'Momone': a wayward 14-year-old girl whom Edith dubbed 'ma mauvause génie,' 'my evil spirit.' Over the decades Momone would be banished by countless men who tried to reform Piaf, only to be called back by the singer whenever she once again found herself alone. And almost inevitably the teenage Edith got mixed up with le milieu, the mafia that ran much of Paris’ club and cabaret scene. During these years she usually had one or another “protector,” some thug who made sure she was always incriminated in his felonies and helped himself to her meager wages. As Burke points out, 'her life with her father had predisposed her to having a boss who took her earnings and dictated her behavior.'” 

~ http://www.salon.com/2011/03/29/no_regrets_carolyn_burke/

Funny book, old passage

"I live between worlds. Half the time I like doing housework, I care a lot about how I look, I warm up to men and flirt beautifully (I mean I really admire them, though I'd die before I took the initiative; that's men's business), I don't press my point in conversations, and I enjoy cooking. I like to do things for other people, especially male people. I sleep well, wake up on the dot and don't dream. There's only one thing wrong with me:
I'm frigid." 

~ The Female Man by Joanna Russ

Refugees

It's like, a lot of them are not that far away and they are picking your food all the time and it would be easy to go and visit them or actively act like you think about them if you chose to do so.

Your grandmother could do that

Work in "one of the top three most dangerous occupations in the United States."

http://nfwm.org/education-center/farm-worker-issues/health-safety/ 

Old ideations

Old: bla bla bla stuck working at this restaurant breathing in second hand smoke, no I don't have a boyfriend, no I don't want to go out with anyone that works here, no i don't fancy the customers, the doctor who taped up my feet, dumb sexist discrepancy in pay wages but there was that nice girl who worked at the Jane Goodall foundation...we were going to hang out, but emergency duty called and she left by the time I came back "I am draggin' you are draggin' everybody's draggin'" that was well-articulated by the server/chemist who got the manager to clarify exactly why women can't be barback...big lecturesome letters on the wall about why you are not working hard enough, look at the sous chef in the wrong way and he will say something very nasty about you in Spanish...horse race madness women in big floppy hats and the men who buy drinks spilling everywhere...

Why not? Because

Life is not donuts (more callous comments about what might have tilted your life toward tragedy, drugs, disrespect, violation, how the privileged inherit the right to blithely stamp out the experience of others, ignore the well-being of the workers, donuts make some people feel great but death by diabetes doesn't heal infertility or alcoholism) when the peanuts triggered anaphylaxis the donut party didn't happen.

Beautiful movie watching Saturday

The artist friend flaked out again. This happens once  a year or so. I have never met her.

Finally watching La Vie en Rose.

Dinner was nice...roast chicken and edamame and greens and Syrah...

But then, that one scene was very tragic and sad.

Put the food away, please...and no more wine. For now.

I wonder how much of this is true....

Whats that...Did she do that on purpose?

Yes. She doesn't want carrot juice.

I would never do that. I love carrot juice.

Well I guess you're not Edith Piaf then.

Nope.

Marion Cotillard can play a femme fatale.

In this, she is the artist.

Bravo Marion Cotillard.

Bravo Edith Piaf.

Stranger walking encounters

"I couldn't even look at a female without crying. That's how bad off I was," a man was explaining to a guy walking his dog. As I walked away, he said, "Her passing by? I'd be way over there..."

In the morning a tall older woman with a walker stood in the middle of the sidewalk beaming at me. I was talking on the phone but she had to stop me because my shirt said Michigan, and she grew up there. "I'll never go back. It's too cold." Her farewell was another big smile and shouting "I love you!"

Big Caturday

Big Cats and Boxes
Big Cats and Catnip
Big Cats and Laser Pointers

O my dear child hood

Women of Hollywood speak out; men of that town invited to be less disgusting...

http://mobile.nytimes.com/2015/11/22/magazine/the-women-of-hollywood-speak-out.html?referer=

Freakin' kittens

Favorites for brothers

Sitting in a tree swinging legs over limbs


Tombigbee

Like nine year olds fishing



It's True That We Love One Another


(I imagine!)

Lit stuff

Looked up a distant relative; she's quoted in this analysis of Wuthering Heights somewhere...

http://feralfeminisms.com/sm-wuthering-heights/

Lovely

National name changing day / International let a man lecture you about how much you oppress him day

DDT 2

Delighted Donut Trust / Donut Diabetes Trauma

Good for these two

Brother and sister, before they stopped talking.



I Can Tell That We Are Gonna Be Friends

Blow up doll therapy

I have a really great idea....

It's for women who get rage-y at the patriarchy but want to be sort of okay and nice-ish in real life.

Kick a doll. Or whatever.

(A male doll.)

Felt the need to clarify. Since they're always female, stereotypically...

Curious

how many radio listeners tune into a Led Zeppelin song and think, "Oh, hooray for the group that visited Asian brothels."

(To tell the truth, I don't always...it depends on the song...)

Extra step planning for a lifetime

Come up with ideas, find a sympathetic male, and get him to say them so they will be listened to.

Article about refugees made me think of that for some reason.

https://reason.com/blog/2015/09/30/no-ben-carson-and-donald-trump-the-major#pq=Jl7Ei7

A dream ghost

After a detour by an old Victorian house while on vacation this summer, I had to look it up on the web. It was rumored to be haunted. I read about the ghost. It became very strange. I started remembering old dreams. Then I went online and looked at the back of it. It was the same house of the old dreams. I didn't recognize it until I saw the back of it. I had dreams that were old and forgotten, and then I found them online. They were dreams through the eyes of the ghost.I thought they were just dreams. Then I found that.

A book character ghost

Because of a mnemonic for flowers (leucolaena made me think of leukemia) I thought of blond girl with leukemia who loved wildflowers in A Summer To Die. I read it and was extremely moved by it when I was younger.

Does she ever re-think

Her choice of celebrity?

That one who misses work to take her mother to all those doctor appointments...

DDT

Depressive D Thoughts

Doesn't do well with friendship.
Dick is more important than food deserts or rape clinics.
Twists things to fit personal agenda all the fucking time.

Shoom

I think that's a name for something. Sometimes I feel like there's some kind of energy coming through me and my personality isn't totally jiving with it yet so maybe if I went for a walk or a swim it would go into the atmosphere or water

M. White

Blah blah blah Jack White says...

I just care/I don't care

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/06/28/upshot/maiden-names-on-the-rise-again.htm

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

http://jezebel.com/5989279/why-do-most-women-still-take-their-husbands-last-name

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

http://www.womenshealthmag.com/sex-and-love/how-men-really-feel-when-you-keep-your-last-name

You'r

CAT BOUNCE
http://cat-bounce.com/

CAT FLAKES
http://purrpurr.org/

Wanted

Adoring Female Students

"Let me tell you about anti-colonialism by colonialising your head with my many brilliant insights."

*****

With the full on approval of the many, many, ever so many talented and intelligent women who also enjoy them!

Half of a ghost story

Scary Girl in Mirror 

I went to a guy who is a medium a while back. Actually, I went to a place where there are a bunch of mediums and you get randomly assigned to one. Male, female. I wanted to talk about a male friend of mine who had passed away, and the male African American medium who was assigned to me did a little of that, but he was much more interested in telling me about a young, very attractive blond woman who had died of leukemia. There is no one in my life that I know of who is like that. But he kept insisting that she was around me. "She's very attractive!" He kept saying and smiling. And I had a feeling he meant that she was very attractive not only in appearance but also her demeanor...something about it was really good...and it was so weird and I had no idea who it could be. So I sort of scratched it off as maybe he was a quack and he didn't know what he was talking about...But then...days afterwards...I started to get some ideas as to who it might be...and it was very surprising...

Yeah, weird that way

Seriously, it's unfortunate this never occurred to someone. I am, to someone, for some small moment in time, that white girl. I'm not complicated, with lots of my own thoughts and feelings, or even if I am, fuck it, he's not got the time to deal with that when he's got his own important message to spread, but anyway, I'm that white girl, and the older dude needs to let me know all about what I don't know. What he doesn't know is that I wasn't that white girl in my last life. In fact, when he was knee high and I was about his age, born at about the same time, I was a lot like him. They'd have stuck us next to each other in the school pictures and put us through all the same macho bullshit together as we were growing up. But that was a short life for me. Long for him, short for me. So I came back as this other person. Now I look like "that white girl" to him, and all that baggage, and all that need for him to tell me shit, and instead it's like, he should tell me some things and I can listen, and I can tell him some things and he can listen, and that's how we should be communicating. Do it better next time. Also, wtf is up with the dynamic of "I treated the women wrong and now I'm gonna confeeeeeessss" and all these women are like That's The Time... and Killing Me Softly... Is it just wonderful biology?

Hmmm, music trivia

Jack married Meg White on my birthday.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meg_White



Meg White Sings Rated X

Hopeful sentiment

Let's fall on the ice and survive it somehow.

Like

http://www.adweek.com/adfreak/man-poses-target-facebook-trolls-haters-its-gender-neutral-move-epic-replies-166364

Musique Beautiful

This is good. Zero Point.
It has been played live.
I have only gone to one live concert by this artist. I connect to the music on the internet. It kind of makes me want to write about a ghost story. But I don't want to yet. My back and my heating pad are my center stage at the moment.

lo siento mucho

omg, I know she's so positive and inspiring, yet I feel like I never want to ever be...
http://bikinibodymommy.com/blog/

~~~~~~

mmmmm
http://www.military.com/daily-news/2015/09/27/army-denies-that-ranger-school-was-fixed-so-women-could-pass.html

~~~~~

to put on apple slices
http://yourresetbutton.net/its-friday-im-in-love-with-trader-joes-sunflower-seed-butter/

Some laundry hanging art

Monks Hanging Laundry ~ Carlo Canevari

By Richard Boyer

Whimsical Laundry Art by Sascalia

oof

actually, i think slow jams for the old boys network puts an ache in my back and a kink in my organization...will try to finish putting away the laundry at least...

In retrospective

I think I'm not too good, but also not too bad. I do have a lot of interest in making something of my experiences, and I know people deserve to experience life and it's variety...when I was younger I discovered a photograph of a beautiful couple having a simple wedding on the beach in California, and then I found out that they divorced, the mother died, and that their beautiful daughter grew up to become a dominatrix and a scholar...and there are a whole collection of other life experiences I had, too...which makes me feel like saying, I feel as if I am at the point in my life where I am not quite so interested in the pleasure of pain that sometimes is a part of the human experience, and I'm becoming more interested in...some kind of return to innocence...and maybe sometimes delving into feelings that are kind of like flying...and maybe these things will be more complex than I would have thought and wanted to deal with when I was younger...but now...things are better for me, and sometimes I am going to be doing things in ways I probably did not anticipate, but that's just because I structured my life in a certain way to have more learning experiences and surprises.

A find

I'll have to ask where The Female Man came from. This is a benefit of moving: unearthing old books you had no idea were packed away somewhere.

http://www.ravishly.com/2015/04/09/female-man-and-its-discomfort-femininity

(However, that's not the same cover...)

https://sfmistressworks.wordpress.com/2011/06/04/the-female-man-joanna-russ/

(Nor that one...)

http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/908311.The_Female_Man

(That's the one.)

Vista

Today

Peace on earth, good will to people

tranquility, nature walks, and well-organized apartments

I have an interest

There's a Frida Kahlo painting I'd never heard of before.

http://lisawallerrogers.com/2009/04/30/frida-kahlo-the-suicide-of-dorothy-hale/

http://www.fridakahlofans.com/c0260.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rik9Njjb4C4

I guess

If you were ever an older sister who had much to do with helping your younger sister as you were growing up, even if you don't have your own biological kids, it's hard not to take some interest in parenting...

Evening visitor

The little girl who is not a cat but an actual human child and was sitting on my step yesterday explained that she was there because she couldn't go into the pool. So she was out to greet people and hug her "Hello Kitty" doll. I think she's proof parenting can be hard. That's why some people made poor decisions, like beating their kids with a belt when they're kids, and making not-so-wise jokes after baby showers. Yes, it is tough to be parent.

Curious to know

If Frida Kahlo's life had any super peace-filled, tranquil moments.

http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/1995/09/frida-kahlo-diego-rivera-art-diary

There must have been some.

So funny

Your dad's comments about not having kids were just jokes. You not wanting to have kids and your nice and mild mannered parent who works for charity used to use a belt but whatever, when you wrote "insubordination will be met with 50 lashes" on your card it was really just a joke a joke a joke to drown in forever...congratulations, your dad wasn't shooting blanks....

Well

I do love art. And people who can make me feel creative.

Today had a strange moment. I was falling asleep, eyes felt closed to me, and then, "Look," a picture was shoved in my face of as guy with two kittens. I thought maybe he looked like my first boyfriend, and said it shocked me awake. " Really? I didn't know you were falling asleep. Your eyes were open."

My experience: eyes were shut, then I was forced awake.

When life gets weird

Perhaps you can just say to yourself, I guess you can just keep trying to wake up and make wiser decisions...

Hmmm!

The thing where u help set up for a baby shower and behold the pool of your dreams...

So much chatter

The other day the boyfriend of the really pretty woman who is my carport neighbor was out there listening to sports talk radio. So much drama. Men are the original soap opera aficionados. And they live to gossip.

They should wear more makeup and dresses too. Like in NATURE. Just look at peacocks.

I like the Frida guy in The Growlers "Monotonia" video...

judo tapestry

judo
tapestry

Attempt to be philosophical

This evening I went by the old place and did not see that cat. Instead, conversed with her owner. Yes, the universe will make me talk not only to cats but to people.

Then I thought I'd be boring and study at the coffee house...and the guy from last week was there again. SIGH. He said something like, "It's been a long time!" And I was thinking, oh, this would be less awkward if you were that kid from the other place who stacked chairs because he thought I worked there and then followed me out into the parking lot and made jokes and said I was beautiful.

But it wasn't so bad.

So that's the difference between those guys and a great artist who gets pissed off at you for not listening to his ideas, and follows you around for weeks and doesn't seem to respect you. That's the difference. Those guys were a lot nicer. They didn't have super mean thoughts about you for ignoring them or acting like you didn't want to talk to them. They were NICER. Just NICER. Moreoever, I know those guys don't have entourages of people who treat them like a genius and make excuses for their bad behavior because they are talented and famous. They may be talented, and they may one day be famous, but probably not. AND I think that if women are friends with a "genius" and know he was not good with women in the past but make too many excuses for him, that is very misogynistic. It is misogyny by women perpetuated against other women. I'm pretty sure at least half of the misogyny in the world is perpetuated by women. People make mistakes, and forgiveness is good, but sometimes they should be better about owning up to them, and they should not have hoards around them making excuses for their bad behavior and that is what I don't like about glamour and fame. YUCK, I say, YUCK to all of that. And by the way...tenure is also kind of suspect. It seems very easy to abuse that power, based on what I saw/experienced.  Academic environments are suspect. Even though they are also wonderful places.

But anyway. This guy at the coffee house might be there a lot and I don't want to quit going, so I talked to him and was nice to him when he came over. He brought up my age. I told him I thought we were about the same age. He said he was low 30s. I said I was older than that. He said "How old?" Then I told him. Then I asked him his age again. Yes, we are the same age.

He was kind of wistful. I said I live with my boyfriend and he joked "Do you think he'd make breakfast for us?" He said I had a nice look about me and kept wanting to talk, but he didn't get too weird about it. And I will keep going to that place because I like to study there. So I'm not the witch who freaks out about getting approached, if the person is relatively respectful.

I really am disappointed by how some women will make excuses for men's bad behavior, though. Men don't deserve a medal for not touching someone. Following a person around to the point where that person is made uncomfortable is not respectful to that person, especially when it's done with a "how dare you ignore my very important ideas" demeanor.

I think half the problem I have is with the way women make too many excuses for bad male behavior. If some guy did that to their niece or daughter, I'd hope they would hold a much higher standard.

This place is different

Inquisitive children want to come into your place instead of cats...(not now, too messy, & not without your parents...)

Interesting

Banksy's organization is called Pest Control.

http://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/the-story-behind-banksy-4310304/

Sure it's gonna improve sometime

Mr. Success Story has a next door neighbor who collapses on his front stoop moaning and gnashing her teeth about illness and infertility and environmental pollution. He steps over her. Off to attend a rewards banquet, off to save the suffering in a faraway country, off to another plane to catch...

A-Oh

While My Guitar Gently Weeps for the disorganized state of my apartment.

I liked...

on my way out, this little girl in the complex sat on my doorstep and asked me if I would play with her...I had to go but I told her maybe later and I was sincere and she seemed to appreciate that...she's funny...

From the other day:

Little Girl: What is that?

New Neighbor Moving In: It's a dolley.

Little Girl: No it's not!

Crass

Aside from other issues in parts of an interview I watched earlier, I was genuinely annoyed by the part where Artist A congratulates Artist B on his kid by saying, "He's not shooting blanks," followed by really self-indulgent laughter. Way to be insensitive to any and all people having infertility issues in the audience. Seriously. Why do you need to demonstrate your callous insensitivity and inflict it on other people? It made me think that if some coffee house guy ever came up to me and started to go on about his abilities and how he's "not shooting blanks," he would at the very least earn a look of disgust. It's about as attractive as a seventeen year old bragging about how much he could be of use to a sperm bank because he's so blond-fit-blue-eyed-and-hairless (sadly that is a memory) good grief. Woman is not her womb. Dude is not his dick. Clearly, there is still not a very high awareness of people suffering from infertility, and the earth...wow...no wonder the earth is suffering. It's like I got treated to a model of how I hope to not celebrate my fertility if I ever feel it is creating a life form. I wanted to write two ghost stories, but I instead indulged myself...mitigated slightly by listening to songs from "The White Album." (Hey Bungalow Bill..While My Guitar Gently Weeps...Happiness Is A Warm Gun...) But ugh, man. No muy impresionante...(except for looking like a jerk to other people.)

Female ghosts

To be continued...

Note to self

If I ever come back as mirror and I then have this great desire to change the world and make art and if in the course of weird events for some strange reason some girl makes me want to physically follow her around while I'm making that art, I think will tell myself that it will be ultimately much more respectful and nicer to both myself and to her and also to my future girlfriends and etcetra if instead I choose to...wait, I'm a mirror! Mirrors are not animate objects. No worries about that, then. Ha ha. PHEW.

http://weknowyourdreams.com/mirror.html

But if I ever come back as a poltergeist...

Huh!

New place.
Black and white kitty comes in.
Meow.

Actually kind of nice on the car ride today...

These three:

I Can't Help It (even though I didn't hear it much growing up...)
Angel of Small Death (even though I'd never heard it before...)
Tiny Dancer (even though I'm not so ballerina~esque in this life...)

(http://www.kcrw.com/on-air)

mischieviousness

living with someone who once made the new girl at his work believe in a chupacabra

So. This is her top video...

20 million plus views for "Highway To Hell"

Also, there's this girl who is my carport neighbor and she's really sweet-natured and looks like a blond girl who could be in an '80s music video...

(Btw today I was forced to acknowledge I like these previously unappreciated lyrics: In walks her daddy / Standin' six foot four / He said you ain't gonna swing / With my daughter no more)

Today her car was only very slightly in my way but she made a big deal out of getting it out of the way for me, even though I said she wasn't in my way and I could get by, she still INSISTED on moving her car and gave me a huge smile and a wave when I drove out....Just a really nice, sweet smile...She didn't fuckin' follow me around for weeks and get all bitter when I didn't pay attention to her big important words...NOPE.

Isn't it amazing.

writers smiters

watching scent of a woman clips melted my brain of wonderful eviscerating commentary
vibes of annoyance to these two
you're so famous!
you might be an anonymous housewife when you reincarnate

Memories....

Trips to Perelandra with big old embarrassing video equipment and meals at Kilroys afterward...

Just because

it's less than easy, I have to try get a hold of someone (again...) and ask him about the movie he recommended to me a very long time ago...



Silver Linings Playbook Trailer

Influences

https://faithhopeloveinyou.wordpress.com/2012/02/22/dear-jesus-part-1/

http://imgfave.com/search/andrew%20lloyd%20webber

Google

Veteran's Day

Wish a Vet (Female, Male, Whatever) A Reprieve From Overly Out Of Balance Societal Issues Day.

(That Would Have To Do With Out Of Balance Male/Female Dynamics IMO. AGAIN.)

Like for some reason, every single time I start to get happy about how well I'm resolving things, some new thing has to come up. Every single time something new comes up. I give up. I give up. I give up. I give up.



Bell

Clear Day

uno

dos

(house and trees way far off looked Italian)

tres

cuatro

cinco

seis