Pages

Wednesday, January 30, 2019

otro cuento

chopping veg got interrupted by laundry
https://www.kcrw.com/culture/shows/welcome-to-la/grace-of-the-sea

pineapple hot dogs!

"tell the world to go to hell"

"i was so pretty i swear"

"it was not an especially dramatic experience"

"they forgave him and welcomed him back"

tbh maybe all that chopping hurts the back
many breaks

~~~~~~~

chop chop sweet charlotte
http://cinema.wisc.edu/blog/2016/10/27/delightfully-disturbing-hushhush-sweet-charlotte
why do the adults want me to watch this crazy film
oh maybe they want me to be cultured


CHOP
CHOP
CHOP
CHOP

you know why ppl pay for pre-cut salad mixes

This is a nice time

It's true
The vehicle feels like it can do things right now.
;-)

This is for chopping lots of vegetables tonight

This is for some kind of non-noisy cleaning tomorrow (maybe?)

When I can look at a screen I might watch an documentary at some point
(nuns, mushrooms, electric cars???)

Tuesday, January 29, 2019

People are nature

People need rest...
Or fun, or whatever...
People do need it...
And maybe...
A new "Elimination Diet" lol...

A man's morning bus ride

Mohanad Elshieky:

"This morning, ICE agents got on my Greyhound bus that was headed from Spokane to Portland. They walked around before they asked me and few others to step outside and took my documents and interrogated me for around 20 mins then claimed my papers were fake and that I’m 'illegal'.

1:08 PM · Jan 27, 2019 · Twitter for iPhone"
  https://mobile.twitter.com/MohanadElshieky/status/1089631310606266368

To stare at a castor bean plant

Imagine or seem to remember a mixed culture person / ancestor walking into some hilly places / mountains as a retreat...

Not everyone does well in jail with a cheese sandwich.

Saturday, January 26, 2019

Especially this part

"We ended our day in the yard of one Bolinas resident who relishes the yearly return of monarchs to his tall trees. He was happy to share the love. He explained how mowing his grass at specific times of the year supported the growth of native grasses and flowers, food sources for the overwintering butterflies. 'This is a spiritual place,' he told us, 'so I have to take care of it.' We sat down on his lawn to watch the sky around us fluttering with wings. The orange cloud shifted this way and that in the sunlight, the very soul of nature, still present."

"Mary Ellen Hannibal is the author of “Citizen Scientist: Searching for Heroes and Hope in an Age of Extinction.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/25/opinion/monarch-butterfly-california-extinction.html

re re re re

xyz: hi
Magic Eight Ball: yes
xyz: ?
Magic Eight Ball: :-D

This too!

Big chunky quote from an excerpt...

“'Men,' Mom said sourly, as we listened to NPR detail Bill Clinton’s infidelity. They were holding us back, the bad dads and the mass murderers and child abusers, the wife beaters and the harassing bosses and the corrupt politicians. Not until I was much older did I realize how complicated her feelings were, that she loved men too, and that her anger was forged in that love: obviously for my brother, and her father, but also for the coworkers that stood up for her, the ex-boyfriends, the civil rights activists she marched alongside in the National Mall, listening to Martin Luther King Jr. announce that he had a dream.

Decades later, when I first had to tell her who I was, when I asked her to call me Thomas, the memory of the way she’d said 'men' replayed on a loop as I dialed. I’d picked the name as an offering, after her brother who’d passed. 'I love you,' she’d said, so simple and true, and I’d been so grateful for her, my mother.

All you need to know about her is that after I transitioned and despite everything, what matters most is that she never said 'men' that way to me again."

Amateur: A True Story About What Makes a Man
by Thomas Page McBee

Worth a read!

Hah.

"When I transitioned, I was thrilled to feel aligned with my body. But I was also shocked by the scope of privilege my white, male body suddenly received and by the many messages I got about how I was expected to behave to 'prove' my masculinity. I could walk alone late at night without fear, and I also went months without a single person touching me. I accelerated through the ranks at work, and a female friend told me that if I ever wanted a girlfriend again, I needed to not show vulnerability."

~ T. McBee

https://www.vox.com/first-person/2019/1/22/18188776/toxic-masculinity-gillette-ad-apa-guidelines

It is serious

My need to re-balance and heal overrides everything else...
I re-commit once again.

Thursday, January 24, 2019

Mother universe

Help me
*****
Love
♡♡♡♡

Oh good one

Love yourself
Forgive yourself
We can do better

I commit my whole being to healing

I commit my whole being to healing
No one deserves to feel this ill.
It is inhumane.
I commit my whole being to healing
Thirst, face pain, anxiety, nausea, backache.
I commit my whole being to healing
God heal this body.
It's really sad to be so ill in this body.
I commit my whole being to healing
I commit my whole being to healing
I commit my whole being to healing
I commit my whole being to healing

People deserve healing

They really do. Even if I forget or get triggered or get angry or disappointed because the trust was destroyed.

People deserve real healing.

Better tend to your health

Y: was super nice and polite once

X: sinus headache

Ghost friend: look how lonely abusive people are!

Chewed shirt: I am a holy relic

Namaste

Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste
Namaste

Into the mire

HEALING has got to be a priority. I have made progress, yet I feel pushed back. I need to reconnect to the Earth a lot more. Sometimes it seems I have a very limited capacity to help owing to my health situation. Maybe that is what I am supposed to focus on right now. Within the last year, I found out a lot I wish I did not know about society. There are some very misguided people... At the moment I am indentured to my body and I need to find better healing practices. If you are stronger in body, you can enjoy that...find ways to connect to nature...find your higher purpose...believe we can get better...

Wednesday, January 23, 2019

Struggles

I really need help with my frustrating health issues again. Stupid time of month interfering with EVERYTHING. Okay. It will get better.

Things can get better

Sometimes you just have to survive the challenging moments to appreciate the good ones. Bring the intelligence into the light.

Life's work in a certain type of body

Being in sync with nature and cycles and finding ways to be healthy again.

What you don't know about lunch

Any idea how much you, in a special type of female body, might have to pay for the hubris of eating both halves of a panini tuna sandwich at the wrong time of your cycle, even though you had salad and lemon water...skipping breakfast was probably stupid but...heating pad and ginger tea and rest is here to help... (If you did that on day XX maybe you would have been okay).

https://www.endocrinologyadvisor.com/androgen-and-reproductive-disorders/behavioral-modification-fertility-polycystic-ovary-syndrome-pcos/article/827547/

Want it back...

This place was cute and lovely...

https://m.yelp.com/biz/pencil-pasadena

Their landlord would not renew the lease, apparently...

A 5 star review of Pencil by Christina B.: https://www.yelp.com/biz/pencil-pasadena?hrid=DEIPTM0UIWTnc3KPY6sb-Q&utm

Sigh.

Random real life encounter

Last night while outside and looking up at the moon, walked by a woman who said to her friend she was going to return things to Kohls for gas money.

Sunday, January 20, 2019

Interesting, because I like this show

Although I know I missed out on parts due to falling asleep.

https://screenrant.com/series-unfortunate-events-book-tv-differences/

So because of my slight narcolepsy, that was informative.

Books and TV shows are so different.

Change is marvelous

It really is worth it to care for yourself even if you were trained not to...Re-train yourself to do it. You'll accidentally treat others better just by being better to yourself. Treating self better does not = binging on ridiculous material possessions.

Saturday, January 19, 2019

Simple why?

Why have we been separated from each other...
When we could have helped one another...
It's that tragic thing that happens too often on Earth...
Especially now, things are dreadful.

No

Kinda sick of people like that kid.

"The face is in this photo of a clutch of white young men crowding around a single black man at a lunch counter sit-in in Virginia in the 1960s, and in many other images of jeering white men from that era. The face is the rows of Wisconsin high school boys flashing Nazi salutes in a prom picture last year. The face is Brett Kavanaugh—then a student at an all-boys Catholic prep school—'drunkenly laughing' as he allegedly held down Christine Blasey Ford."

~ R. Graham

https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/01/maga-teenager-native-american-veteran-harassment-smile.html

Stop making excuses for them.

you know what happens kinda frequently

I get the urge to look up an old movie and see it's playing somewhere locally on a big screen

ha ha haiku

HEAL
your emotionally exhausting ass
them stars you chainball

Mom nature she no lie

she say she want poetic license hibernate today and then when struggle to store at 5 p.m. it was like drunk jelly limbs altho no liquor was imbibed

Hallelujah

Hallelujah
I could go outside today
Hallelujah!

Permission to rest / balance out cortisol levels maybe? was even better than expected.

Hibernation (poetic license)

It is natural.
It is necessary.
It is my mode today.
Please respect (poetic license) hibernation.
It is a valued process.
It deserves respect.
Blessings.
Nature.


Also it is survival.
Sadly, some of us are more susceptible to toxins.
You can feel it in your body.
Poison to your systems.
Genetics are not fair.
Rest = repair and
hopefully
less pain.


♡yourself♡

Even if your chronic illness has affected you and it feels like you are poorer because women's health care is not prioritized...even if you get tired and you feel like you live with an unacknowledged disability at this part of the cycle, and this has gone on for years...people who don't understand don't understand. Well maybe it will get better soon. You have some tools. You live with someone nice. 

Friday, January 18, 2019

In line at the grocery store

As you buy 77 cents worth of radishes to make life a little more exciting

http://dishingupthedirt.com/recipes/roasted-radishes-anchovies/

Remember that neighbor you lived above in Seattle

https://mobile.twitter.com/DannMoesta/status/1086481696738955264

And he was always cursing by using the same exact words...

Yougoddamnmotherfuckingbastard

That was in a studio apartment on Seneca Street.

It sounded like he lived alone

You decided he must have had an abusive father or something.

Especially because one time he was cursing and crying...

You hoped you would not grow up to be like him ( you were only 21)

Actually it's nauseating to recall...kinda kills the appetite tbh.

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Everyone needs

to take care of their health.
Family, friends, loved ones.
Maybe people you are not so close to, also.

Everyone needs to take care of their health.
It is so.
Fall off and forget?
Get back on and take care of your health.
It will be a very good thing to do.

(~: possible plans

Call the Midwife http://www.pbs.org/call-the-midwife/seasons/season-7/, Dead Like Me S2 (which I never saw & I heard it's not as good as S1 but I will watch on DVD eventually),  or more Marie ;-) https://news.avclub.com/marie-kondo-doesnt-actually-want-you-to-throw-out-your-1831854905

ooooooooooooooold

x: what kind of music do i like? x: i can do U2 sometimes x: have you come here to rectify an inadequate education in your head? x: not really but you can sing this one and feel dramatic and adolescent about yourself x: I mean, I was 14 when it came out and you said we're practically the same age

And could not be silenced

"The homemaker was critical of Trump's temper, immigration policies, views on women's rights and ethical standards, her daughter, Catherine Duff, and son, Art Williams, told NBC News on Thursday."

~ David K. Li

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/newspaper-apologizes-family-not-publishing-mom-s-anti-trump-obit-n959851

Intriguing info, wellness, the "Earth Gym," etc.

Looking at

http://www.wellforculture.com/mother-earth-gym/

+

http://www.wellforculture.com/stretching/

&

http://www.wellforculture.com/sevenbasicmovements/

because of

https://www.bonappetit.com/story/chelsey-luger

&

"Helping is good. Praying for others is good. Using your platform to offer information to others is good."

http://www.wellforculture.com/blog/2018/7/24/disclaimer

"Because we don’t focus on sharing the negative or traumatic elements of our personal stories, many people believe that we have never experienced any of these things, but that’s not the case. We say this because we want you to know that we actually do understand and relate to struggles you might be having. We know that most people face a great number of challenges to wellness including historical trauma, unhealthy relationships, socioeconomic disparities, lack of access to information, food deserts, addictions, lack of support networks, and more."

http://www.wellforculture.com/blog/2018/7/24/disclaimer

"Love and respect are very important components of wellness which do not get mentioned often enough on typical American health and fitness sources, but they are always relevant."

http://www.wellforculture.com/blog/2018/7/24/disclaimer

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

I really think this will be lovely

to read

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/36540759-harry-s-trees

and a nice break from other nonsense.

"After all, when a young girl asks you to believe in fairy tales, sometimes you just have to obey."

~ Booklist (starred review) https://www.joncohenbooks.com/reviews/

Pennsylvania pictures :-)
https://www.joncohenbooks.com/inspiration/

HELL~O

"According to WNYC, the TSA is one of the lowest-paying federal agencies; the typical starting salary of an agent is $17,000 (other estimates say it’s closer to $25,000). Many agents may not be able to afford child care, or they may be finding cash-paying jobs while the government is shut down, as the last regular paycheck was not sent."

~ A. Shrikant

https://www.vox.com/the-goods/2019/1/16/18183634/tsa-government-shutdown-travel-flying

What is

Intelligence.

Probably it was not eating a white flour product at this time of everythingness.

Right now it is intelligent to rub my womb and say nice things to it. This actually somewhat helps.

And, chew raw ginger.

I know it does not impress some people.
Wait 'til they get reborn.

IRL good deeds 2019

From "I live by Yosemite National Park. Here’s what’s been happening since the shutdown."
By Tracy Barbutes:

"Sandy Hernandez (left) and Addis Oda collect trash in the Swinging Bridge picnic area. Oda works for the Yosemite Conservancy, and during the partial government shutdown, he is volunteering his time to collect trash throughout Yosemite Valley. Hernandez works for the park and has been furloughed."

https://www.vox.com/first-person/2019/1/16/18179038/government-shutdown-national-park-yosemite

~~~~~

"Kati Simek volunteered to clean up trash during her first visit to Yosemite. She said she hopes to return some day because 'it’s epic.'"

"Kati Simek, age 35, traveled all the way to Yosemite from Seattle after reading about the destruction happening in the parks since the shutdown. She’s been picking up litter for two days — including beer bottles and soiled diapers within feet from trashcans as well as 'cigarettes butts, lots of cigarette butts. It’s very disheartening,' she said. 'The national park system is one of the greatest gifts our government ever gave us.' This is her first trip to Yosemite."

https://www.vox.com/first-person/2019/1/16/18179038/government-shutdown-national-park-yosemite

Sauce

On kale. Made with curry instead of mustard.

https://www.bobsredmill.com/recipes/how-to-make/nutritional-yeast-cheese-sauce/

The ransack-the-cupboards diet.

Okay but for real

Be very very good to yourself.
Be wise!
Forgiveness is your friend.

O lady in heaven

Heal me and my grouchy feminine organs.
All these stupid men are gonna reincarnate with female health problems.
They are not gonna like that.
Save us.

Clown Haiku (ignore syllables)

Astral travel fly over 
Lonely insecure man having low expectations & ignoring himself
Pushover 

POV

"Explaining marginal taxes to a far-right former Governor: Imagine if you did chores for abuela & she gave you $10..."
  https://mobile.twitter.com/AOC/status/1085245511324581889

we have

plenty to entertain us

Modern Theater

“'Anything I’d been approached to do before was sort of me on my own, and I just didn’t want to be out there on my own,' Stoynoff told me. 'If I was with a group, I felt a little bit stronger.'”

https://www.vox.com/identities/2019/1/15/18180877/donald-trump-pussy-grabber-natasha-stoynoff-tasha-dixon

There's much to learn...

& there are many opportunities to find new ways of seeing things...

https://health.usnews.com/wellness/for-parents/articles/2017-01-09/secure-attachment-parenting-from-the-inside-out

This type of situation sounds so very sad...

 "About 5 to 15 percent of children in the U.S. exhibit a fourth type of attachment, called disorganized attachment. This is seen as a way of adapting to the unusual experience in which a parent is the source of terror. A deep, older part of the child’s brain’s survival reaction drives the child to move away from the source of terror: the parent. But a newer, mammalian part of the brain that mediates attachment drives the child toward the parent to be safe and soothed. Because of this paradox, the child’s mind fragments and their behavior freezes. With a parent being the source of terror and confusion, fear without solution is created, and there is no organized strategy the child can employ to address it. The child’s sense of self is fragmented due to this disorganized attachment relationship." ~ D. SIEGEL

Monday, January 14, 2019

Multi-organ

Sasha Ottey:

"PCOS, the most common hormone disorder in women, receives less than 0.1% of the research funding from the National Institutes of Health. PCOS has historically been treated as a reproductive disorder and not much else, even though research shows its connection to metabolic dysfunction, cardiovascular dysfunction, psychosocial disorders, cancer, eating disorders, skin disorders, liver disorders and more. PCOS has evolved from being a gynecologic and reproductive disorder to a multi-organ system disorder. However, very little research is being funded to study the other comorbidities of PCOS. It is now known that there is a connection between infertility and overall physical health."

https://www.lotusflowerpcos.com/en/sasha-ottey-interview/

Change

Change

"Sasha Ottey calls this phenomenon 'health-care gaslighting.' Ottey founded the Atlanta-based nonprofit PCOS Challenge: The National Polycystic Ovary Syndrome Association in 2009 to raise awareness of PCOS, a hormonal disorder affecting the ovaries that’s often linked to infertility, diabetes, and pelvic pain. Despite the fact that PCOS was first identified and researched in 1935 and the CDC has estimated it affects some 6 to 12 percent of adult women in the United States, many doctors still don’t recognize the symptoms. Women with PCOS and similar conditions like endometriosis and uterine fibroids, Ottey says, 'have been told to suffer in silence.' Additionally, because PCOS often causes obesity or weight problems, many women with PCOS experience not just sexism but what Ottey calls 'weight bias' in the health-care system."

~ A. Fetters

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2018/08/womens-health-care-gaslighting/567149/

CHANGE

Here's a helper

For when there's too much neighbor noise but I need to be in the kitchen or something.


T.A. ~ Fire to Your Plain

HAW


Dead Like Me - The Best of Daisy Adair (Season 1)

HA


Pink ~ Stupid Girls

Hello

"A California federal district court judge halted the Trump administration's weakening of Obamacare's contraceptive mandate Sunday, a day before the new rules were to take effect.

The injunction, however, only applies in the coalition of 13 Democratic states, plus the District of Columbia, that brought the lawsuit.

In his ruling, Judge Haywood Gilliam, Jr., said the states 'face potentially dire public health and fiscal consequences from the implementation of the Final Rules.'"

~ T. Luhby

https://www.cnn.com/2019/01/13/politics/trump-contraceptive-mandate-ruling/index.html

But omg what if

She built factories and had a jet and existed in a big masculine body.

https://www.nme.com/news/music/poppy-accuses-grimes-bullying-play-destroy-2415095

That would be soooo different.

Sad patriarch effect

A man who is abusive to his own kids will definitely not be nicer to anyone else's.

Sunday, January 13, 2019

Too true

Unfortunately...

"The men who are so quick to defend his legacy and disregard his misogyny not only see themselves in him as the once nerdy science boy who was able to become a symbol of cool; in all likelihood, they have been complicit, at a minimum, in perpetuating the kinds of conduct that Feynman is guilty of."

~ Leila MacNeil

https://thebaffler.com/outbursts/surely-youre-a-creep-mr-feynman-mcneill

Yikes :-(

"on several occasions when she unwittingly disturbed either his calculus or his drums he flew into a violent rage, during which time he attacked her, threw pieces of bric-a-brac about and smashed the furniture."

https://gizmodo.com/5916502/richard-feynmans-fbi-files-make-fascinating-reading

An age of

Needlessly cruel
people lost
long
long
long
ago

Saturday, January 12, 2019

So far have listened to the first half...


Anand Giridharadas: The Thriving World, The Wilting World, & You

I get to watch the rain drip

off the lanceolate leaves of a Bottlebrush tree.

It's nice.

Migration Week *Catholics*

"It is particularly troubling that a speech of this nature comes while the church recognizes #NationalMigrationWeek, a moment to reflect upon the desperate and harrowing circumstances confronting migrants, immigrants, and refugees," the Mercy Sisters tweeted after the speech.

http://www.catholicnews.com/services/englishnews/2019/catholic-groups-and-others-rail-against-trump-border-crisis-speech.cfm

0000

"Kaine said that furloughed workers are actually receiving paychecks Friday, but they have nothing but zeros on them, 'which is sort of like pouring salt in a wound,' he said."

~ T. Barrett

https://www.cnn.com/2019/01/11/politics/mitch-mcconnell-congress-shutdown/index.html

Had to

Abandon your miserable (& unfortunately prone to cruelty) brother.

Darn.

I ate a salad.
I feel like I want a peanut butter sandwich, too.

For some designer soda bottles

A fearful, abusive man with an underdeveloped moral code is aided by many cowardly accomplices. They all inflict needless suffering on their fellow human beings.

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/kavanaugh-offers-to-pay-for-wall-by-recycling-his-empties?intcid=inline_amp

Friday, January 11, 2019

Idle thought

Hope one who still lets self get pushed around entirely too much develops a better appreciation of the gifts from the Universe.

A picture

"Good morning. This is the Metro into DC. Now imagine every restaurant, store and public space also being this empty. The economy of DC/MD/VA has come to a grinding halt. No one has any income. No one is going out to eat or shop. Businesses are closing. The economy is crashing."

~ Tracy M.
  https://mobile.twitter.com/dandelionmama/status/1083741118708236290

Cloud recipe

I am intrigued...

https://www.mypcoskitchen.com/keto-paleo-cloud-bread/

Even though some of the ingredients make it look kinda weird ( well, all that mayo... )

Story of the recipe creator...

https://www.mypcoskitchen.com/pcos-story/

♡healer♡

Help it is that same stuff again

I ♡ modern plumbing

Had to go out to eat noodle soup on a night when the kitchen sink had issues...

123


1) Sorry he does not listen to you

2) It is clear he has been surrounded by unethical people with a strong tolerance for abuse, machismo, misogyny, racism, etc. since childhood

3) Things made by people (designer outfits, cars, rockets, albums, perfume bottles, candles, money) are nice but not more important than the welfare of living human beings, puppies, butterflies, etc.

still pretty

Robbie Robertson and The Red Road Ensemble ~ Heartbeat Drum Song

Anyone work for tips in the DC area?

It would be awful to rely on them right now during the government shutdown. Northern Virginia still pays servers $2.13 an hour, just as it did when I was a server 2 decades ago.

:-(
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tipped_wage

"At home, when he explained the family’s situation to his 10-year-old daughter, he could tell she was troubled.

"I said, ‘Do you have enough for the lunch?’ and she told me, 'But Daddy, you don’t have any money!''he said. 'I think she feels hunger but she doesn’t tell us. As a father, this is very painful.'”

~ S. Tavernise

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/09/us/government-shutdown-washington-dc-effect.html