It happens

Today my friend came out of a bathroom stall and washed her hands next to me. No, it wasn't really her... I was in a much better mood driving home.

What's ridiculousness

When you could do creative projects with people...but what???

Looking for some music...

Powerful Pain Relief Music ~ Brainwave Power Music

Interesting details

"'I just tried to create a little chaos,' Septima said, explaining her role. 'Chaos is a good thing. God created the whole world out of it. Change is what comes of it.'"

~ http://www.safero.org/articles/septima.html


"She called sexism 'one of the weaknesses of the civil rights movement.'"

 ~ http://www.safero.org/articles/septima.html


"'I never felt that getting angry would do you any good other than hurt your own digestion,' she explained. 'It kept you from eating, which I liked to do.'"

 ~ http://www.safero.org/articles/septima.html

Something to see

How to change it?

Believe that you are worth something in spite of all the poisonous, misogynistic messages both men and women have communicated about the worth of women throughout the course of this lifetime.

Maybe the forest can be a library if they keep it

Sleep peacefully for health

https://www.atlasobscura.com/places/forest-of-the-future-library

Sleep peacefully to live

http://onbookes.blogspot.com/2015/06/the-talking-oak-by-alfred-lord-tennyson.html

It wasn't enough

This is a very very very bad government. Sometimes I feel like there is a society of selfish people who just want to prop up fake men with fake power and they will kill women and even other women are a part of it. They seem to think women are good for nothing unless they bear children and shower endless compliments on fake men with fake power. The physical pain is not good. I don't want to get in a state of mind where I start believing the messages that will sabotage health. Maybe I should just not look at the internet.

A cool library thing

Septima Clark digital history project

http://ldhi.library.cofc.edu/exhibits/show/septima_clark/virtual-tour

There needs to be some better news

I'll be doing a lot of ease physical pains rituals before bed again.

I think there is a nightmarish mentality about money and a mentally ill government operating in this country. Should all people who would like to be a part of libraries move to another profession, such as coal mining?

"In its FY2019 budget proposal, unveiled today, the Trump administration has once again proposed the permanent elimination of the National Endowments for the Arts and Humanities, as well as the elimination of the Institute of Museum and Library Services (and with it virtually all federal library funding)."

~ https://www.publishersweekly.com/pw/by-topic/industry-news/publisher-news/article/76047-trump-renews-bid-to-eliminate-library-funding-nea-and-neh.html

Help?

https://www.bustle.com/p/the-new-federal-budget-proposal-could-mean-a-drastic-cut-for-libraries-but-you-can-help-in-easy-way-8289690

It really is like some kind of nightmare. He wants teachers to carry guns everywhere. He tweets something from Fox and thinks his approval rating is 93%.

Can a society's hypermasculine madness kill people? It seems that way. It's certainly doing it's best to kill dreams.

How did we seem to become a nation that makes things worse for the next generation? Blind ignorance and greed and short term tax benefits?

This was ridiculous

Is it not

Sometimes I have thoughts like what if I think someone is going to come back and no one believes but I guess that is the way of this culture.

teensy

Perhaps they aren't

The Boys Are Not Alright

No it's a leaf

Is this a man telling you he's more important than you are because he's got a much bigger paycheck and a biblically inflated ego? Is this a woman making excuses for her brother or father or boyfriend or husband for sexist behavior that she'd never excuse in another woman? Is this a man telling you that what hypothetically might happen to a him is much more important than what literally happened to....no...it's a leaf...

Your society is corrupt

She is easily fooled and bought off by you.

She treats women worse by indulging you and making excuses.

The more greedy and self-indulgent you are, the richer and more self-absorbed you become, in the society which enables such behavior.

All the Ivankas and Melanias feed your megalomania.

https://www.elitedaily.com/p/do-ivanka-melania-trump-get-along-the-answer-is-kind-of-complicated-7793557

http://thehill.com/policy/defense/375481-trump-the-generals-would-love-to-have-a-military-parade

https://shareblue.com/trumps-approval-all-time-low-gun-control/

https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2018/02/25/trump-reelection-2020-approval-ratings-217037

You know this is good

Orlando movie

Fascinating

A tiny dollhouse book might have inspired Orlando.

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/miniature-book-penned-virginia-woolfs-lover-and-muse-published-first-time-180967036/



A movie too


http://www.phoenixnewtimes.com/film/life-of-the-party-just-might-be-director-sally-potter-10130543

thesetwoarenever

ever

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/02/13/the-prairie-wife

getting married

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/12/11/cat-person

NEVRE

Vista

Wh~wh~why???

I wanted some, and I got it.

Strawberry Fields Tea

from Merkaba

Maybe will try Purple Tea next time.

Strawberry Fields Forever

He is....She is...

Where no.... 

(Keren Ann)

They paved... 

(Counting Crows)

He is the cracker.

She is the cheese.

"A failure to communicate on their part does not constitute a failure to communicate."

MisterMisterMisterMisterMister

WHAT SONG WHAT SONG WHAT'S A GOOD SONG

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Mister

You r sparkle motion

Understatement: Needs Improvement

"Mothers’ equal pay day, which takes place in May, represents the symbolic day when the median pay of mothers who work full time, year-round, catches up to the pay that working fathers received the previous year."

 ~ https://www.aauw.org/2016/05/06/dads-get-a-bonus-but-moms-get-a-penalty/

How's the system working?

"The gender pay gap hurts women and families at every life stage, and is a major contributor to economic insecurity for older women. Single women, women of color, and LGBTQ women typically feel these impacts the most."

http://www.eoionline.org/blog/gender-pay-gap-contributes-to-economic-insecurity-for-older-women/

Look at what they didn't tell us again???

Women have more student loan debt. Women take longer to pay off student loan debt. Therefore, women pay more interest over time. Women have 2/3 of the student loan debt in this country.

--------

"Cumulatively, men hold less student debt ($477 billion compared to $833 billion held by women), and are also able to pay off their debt faster, giving them an edge when it comes to jumpstarting their lives."
~ https://www.refinery29.com/2017/05/155965/student-loans-women-debt

"Black women and Latina women lag the furthest behind: "Black women and Hispanic women paid off only about 12 percent and 18 percent of their debt in that three-year period, respectively, compared to 33 percent and 60 percent of white and Asian women."

~ https://broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/8x4jxb/crushing-student-loan-debt-is-hurting-women-the-most


I hate the end of vacation.

Everything is better on vacation!

"That Denny's....that Denny's looks like it's an amazing Denny's"

"This rental car...the ride is so smooth...my clean-windowed chariot..."

"The Ontario airport! Someday, I will fly out of you. No more LAX for me!"

Another bimulous night

Book review...

http://www.juliasbookbag.com/2017/09/when-sky-is-like-lace.html?m=1

In NY my mother tricked her boyfriend into thinking she had gotten us a book about science...

https://bimulous.wordpress.com/about/

And later there was Miss Rumphius.

https://scientistseessquirrel.wordpress.com/2016/04/04/to-love-or-to-hate-miss-rumphius/

!!!!

https://scientistseessquirrel.wordpress.com/2016/03/07/graphic-design-error-and-accidental-learning/

LOL

https://scientistseessquirrel.wordpress.com/2016/03/01/an-introvert-goes-conferencing/

This is when I should be packing

This is what I heard one time: You forgot.
What did I forget. Oh. I forgot to read your book? I guess you remembered I said I would read it. Well, I didn't forget. I just put it off. Yes, I read Townie and The Source of All Things first because they were on the new books library display. Sometimes these things take time...

Shazamed...

Stepping out...
Into your eyes...
No.
Into the light.
That is the song of diners and coffee shops and shopping malls, then and now.
I watched the video tonight.
My favorite images are of the electric lights and signs.

New York State.
The state of early childhood.
Revisiting it means
Four leaf clovers
Rainbow pops
Dusty playgrounds...
A regressive state
Assigned to a whole region.

!!!!!!!!!!

And what was California?
This state would eventually be glimpsed through the window of a train traveling south from Seattle to Los Alamos...

~ Intuitive cleaning ~

Dunk baking soda in water
Scrub and make a shiny tea kettle

S. Stevens ~ Chicago

That place where I had a cleaner and nicer apartment!

One of those on a holiday

It's time to do some housework with musical accompaniment.

Or maybe it will be a do some / avoid some type of day.

Thieves is now an older song.

"I found a great Russian surf horror band" well maybe I will look for them later too.

If your floor is clean....where are the cleaning songs.

Maybe this is one of them...Messer Chups - Magneto - The Open Stage Berlin

The internet makes a lot of tasks more enjoyable and less efficient.

When will it rain?

It is an interesting time to read about Virginia Woolf and think about how there is a lot I did not know.

That time when the good man appeased the cat

Because she sent lonely howls up the staircase after having enjoyed human company and warm lap for much of the evening, so he want back downstairs and slept on the small two-seater sofa...

Bright light makes me wonder

How can one cure annoying floaters.

Where are the prescription sun glasses.

Expeditionary

Yesterday I could talk to friends from school about this library book on Virginia Woolf...one of them says she has Writing as a Way of Healing on her list...I could only read part of an essay by my friend in Personal Effects...the bella figura one...now I want to read the rest of it...

Elsewhere are many details I didn't know...I was surprised that she wrote a poem describing how she tried to make money as a dominatrix...it sounded like it didn't suit her...however, that reminds me, I guess it does suit some people...

http://kinkdoctor.com/episode/kds-grandmas-take-on-the-pilot/

Song poem variations

The Simon Sisters - Who Has Seen the Wind?



Who Has Seen the Wind? (SAB) - by Mary Lynn Lightfoot



UCSB Women's Chorus-Who Has Seen the Wind



Who has seen the wind? Alto ~ HMS Cavalier Singers

************

https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/who-has-seen-wind

The wind yesterday

And frog noises.

You know it's time to go out when...

You've got a prompt like this in your head: The time my thin aunt came back and this time she had a weight problem.

Then & now

Then:
Research an elaborate prohibition-era cocktail!

Now:
Just drink limeade with ice in a sort of fancy glass....

What...how...

http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2018/02/nora-fok-jewelry/

&

http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2016/05/ethereal-sculptures-and-wearable-orbs-mariko-kusumoto/

Mandala magic

http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2018/02/james-brunt-cairns-and-mandalas/

Tango faces with readings

I wondered if "tear-inducing" was a word...

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/108665.Virginia_Woolf

It is...

https://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/7973330
("The Tear-Inducing Magic of Tidying Up")

~~~* *~~~

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/335772.Tree_by_Leaf#

+

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/259967.Silver

It just is

Maybe there is no bad reaction to death.

"I'm on this plane and the engine is shooting sparks and I want my friend to circle around the pilot and make him land it because..."

"Because I ignored the voice that told me I was stupid to take this flight."

Dark room cometh

My headache hopes we get better.
Hallelujah...

One

Maybe or maybe not

Aware

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/are-gaslighters-aware-what-they-do

Your cultural trauma healing needs

Sometimes a guy who stalks a girl is really a good person underneath it all, and sometimes he goes berserk with a gun on Valentine's.

Have you practiced your requisite "himpathy" today?

https://www.guernicamag.com/kate-manne-why-misogyny-isnt-really-about-hating-women/

And you always wanted to heal

It came back
This is your purpose
You are worthy
You can heal
Choose love
You got so sad, mad, wounded
It has sounded like crying
(See him by the drugstore
Cuddling his animal companion)
It has felt like dying
Illness, loss, grief
Your wise self
Your healer self
This is getting stronger now
Your old self is tiring of her old ways
She's changing again...

Choosing a new way

May we find peace and wisdom.
May we find health and love.
May we forgive ourselves and each other.
I got to the point. I choose love, I choose love. A book I read as a child told it's audience to vow to choose love, even if you feel like your heart is breaking. How, why, it got to this point, I can accept it, I can change. A prayer for the new person or self that can be born. Choose wisely.

Oooo, interesting

Love song

https://slate.com/culture/2018/02/an-interview-with-amanda-palmer-about-her-judy-blume-video.html

Cool.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/amanda-palmer-judy-blume-matters_us_5a7b03a5e4b07af4e81fcadd

Shark head, Unicorn head

A kid in Walmart was putting on some large masks and life became a little more fun again...

I bet it would help

Maybe the world will seem better when a certain corrupt individual is no longer...

Where did the fun go

If I reincarnated as a man and I ruined some otherwise nice experience for someone because a culture of men and women still treated women as worth less, I think that would be really sad.

What is the rent for a tent

"Sun Jin, 36, sleeps in a tent not far from the corner of Vine and Santa Monica. She says after a number of health problems, she couldn't pay her rent and has been living on the street for a year and a half."

 ~ https://www.scpr.org/news/2018/02/12/80737/new-billboard-campaign-aims-to-raise-urgency-aroun/

Thank God

Out and about in the world, a person who showed care and respect happened, and it was, just for a bit, a better world. Not having to see how many excuses are still made for overprivileged, unscrupulous, and irresponsible men who don't respect women and give them terrible experiences would also make the world much better place.

Maybe it will get better...

But it's still sad to see people making many excuses...

https://www.elitedaily.com/women/women-everyday-sexism-workplace/1783484

And if some people had just so happened to be born in a female body...

https://www.glamour.com/story/metook12-students-talking-about-sexual-assault

Music comes back...

STOP MENSTRUAL CRAMPS - "Luna's Touch" - Relaxation & Stress Relief Music Therapy

Still better than it was

I found nice music for healing pain...but now machines are noisily ripping up the street outside again, interfering with everything...I still play it...I would like to buy noise canceling headphones but they are so expensive...

Imagine any successful man suddenly afflicted with a womanly health problem in today's society. Presto, he's not there anymore.

He no longer has the same worth or value in the culture which gave him a voice and a paycheck.

Men value him less, and many women do also, for a number of reasons.

Inequality happens when both men and women internalize and inflict sexism on themselves and on each other and then continue to be in denial about their doing so.

So-called tough men are  scared of being "wusses" and certain women accomodate them and ignore their sisters.

They have been trained to devalue other women and prop up fragile male egos, just as those men were socialized it's bad to be like a woman.

If the noise on the street were not here to interfere so much, would I have to write this?

A tool for surviving on a certain path

STOP MENSTRUAL CRAMPS - "Luna's Touch" - Relaxation & Stress Relief Music Therapy

Why. Pain. Teacher.

Always this again. Thank you bed. Thank you heating pad. Hello again. All the time. I don't want this. I don't want to be this crippled. Thank you washcloth/castor oil/warmth. What do I need to learn.

The fingers on this girl

Chopin Etude Op 10 No.4 Valentina Lisitsa

I like snow & tulips

I sent someone in a snowy climate who is recovering from an operation some this weekend...

Unconventional, temporal, modifiable

Outside of Card:
You have really cheated me

Inside of Card:
Perhaps that was your destiny

On earth tonight

A woman and a man sat on the sidewalk outside a drugstore...he was cuddling and swaddling a furry creature...

(In my head: "The rent is too damn high.")

Hmmm.

https://www.zerohedge.com/news/2017-06-02/mapping-us-zip-codes-where-rent-too-damn-high

Blue hand art

http://www.abfarina.com/embroidery-on-fabric/#/palm/

(Beautiful!)

Ah well...

Since I must clean and the live stream of Olympics is eluding me...

https://www.thisamericanlife.org/637/words-you-cant-say

Whiff of hope

But

https://politics.theonion.com/frustrated-hope-hicks-wishing-she-could-find-one-nice-g-1822879296

It

https://www.theonion.com/report-make-it-stop-1822874962

Might

It almost seems like they are related

I think I will go to this place sometime....

Simpson & Colbert in "Waffle House" 

I too have enjoyed the Waffle House. It was sort of the death of my vegetarianism in college. Friends took me to one in Virginia after way too many needle sticks in the ER and doctors decided I didn't need a transfusion so I got three packages of birth control pills and was told to take a triple dose and to eat big iron pills & more meat to cure my anemia and the next night I was seized by a fear of falling into a coma but my stepfather's son, a doctor, talked me out of going back to the hospital, which I'm still so happy about to this day, and my roommate was kind and brought meals with meat in them from the cafeteria and my mother also came down and left embarrassing notes about my menstrual issues for all my professors to read so I eventually recovered but as I ate with my friends that night my mood was I am going to live...and eat bacon! Oh, Waffle House.

About a place

California is where the ice cream truck music circles around the park in February.

Well this could make for some interesting conversation

https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/12/17/is-jen-hatmaker-the-conscious-of-evangelical-christianity-216068

Continuously

"My immature behavior is okay because my wife/girlfriend/friend/colleague knows me better and knows..." Knows what? "Jesus forgives." He does in your world if you're a man.

Seems possible

Rep. Adam Schiff Tells Bill Maher: Nixon May Not Have Been Impeached If Fox News Had Existed Then

A lot of them

"More often, they are outgoing, intelligent manipulators hiding in plain sight, shielded by professional accomplishments and considerable charm."

~ L. Steiner, "Maybe It's Not Surprising..."

There is

There
https://www.npr.org/2018/02/09/584640372/why-men-remain-in-high-power-positions-despite-claims-of-abuse

are
https://www.ted.com/talks/leslie_morgan_steiner_why_domestic_violence_victims_don_t_leave#t-377265

Questions for the Magic 8 Ball

What makes some women okay with dating dudes who have abused women?

~~~~~~

Was Rob's childhood bad and is Hope the special woman who can finally save him?

~~~~~~

"I think I would've been better off if I hadn't been so adaptable"
~ Leslie Morgan Steiner

~~~~~~~

https://militaryfamilies.extension.org/2014/09/22/resource-discovery-why-domestic-violence-victims-dont-leave/

What I thought later

A woman made me Shazam this today.

https://www.npr.org/event/music/506155037/bonobo-kerala

Hmmm.

Choose your health first, not art. You are art.
Choose your health first. Make art later...

Oh...it's a Nirvana cover...

Sturgill Simpson - "In Bloom"

Hello....my old friend...

Pain is back.

A low dose of metformin did not stave it off.
The doctor recommended the low dose of metformin and probiotics. I wasn't as good at taking the latter.

I have ginger and a heating pad. It's survivable. It's not the worst, but it is demanding...

My friend who left cared enough to come back and talk to me and now I am in a new level of  "so this is how it is...."

So this is how it is...if I had known, I woukd have tried to make you stay longer...is that why I didn't, and my intuition didn't either...

A Woman called O~~~~

Herbert Rowbarge 

After much soul-searching

I think I have identified my truest desire what is just that I want all the men I've ever come into contact with to feel the feminine pain and experience the sexism and become much better people, and it seems it's such a noble aspiration but also they should leave me alone when I'm trying to have a solitary walk in the park, as I made pretty clear to someone who was friendly and with whom I was also friendly at first, but then I had to be firmly and clearly not too friendly, and then he was not so friendly either when we accidentally bumped into one another later which was kinda a shame, but mostly "phew" well my younger self would have thought someone my age would be too old to experience these annoyances but gray hair may soon betray the hoary brunette

Make Waves! Rent Sons!

Wave Makers

https://theoutline.com/post/3243/kelly-slater-wave-company-future-of-surfing?zd=1&zi=fu7mfvit 

https://www.theinertia.com/surf/we-surfed-kelly-slaters-surf-ranch-and-we-have-feelings/

Son Rentals

https://twitter.com/patron_sailor/status/961260232411439104

https://rentsons.com/

Just a good dream

It was like about petting joyous creatures who are happy and excited to see you....

Hope actually

Hope seeing a healer helps.

Sleepless

Cause of despair: selfish people who are in denial about their sexism and how much hurt and harm it causes. Stop lying to yourself. It's like you are kicking a sick, poor person in the street to make yourself feel powerful and telling yourself it's okay.

People (could be men or women) who would have treated you better if you had been born in a male body make this world worse for women and also worse for men.

If you punish a girl for making you feel bad, but you would accept or excuse that same behavior in a man, you are misogynist, whether you are in the body of a man or a woman. Very very very hurtful.

Hope?

I hope they never have to deal with someone as self-indulgent, sexist, and untrustworthy as you have been, but they are probably going to, thanks to your example.

We're going to a healer

It's what we can do.
Recurring griefsickness is hell.
I will pay $$$ to get better.
"This is a little beyond normal."
"Yes, I agree."

What humor

I will be here, benign as the scent of cafeteria pizza.

Little Musical Meals & Apertif

"Music slices you in time." ~ N. Gaiman,

http://www.thebreedersmusic.com/bio/

Sturgill Simpson ~ The Promise
Bonobo ~  Kiara

Sturgill Simpson ~ Turtles All The Way Down
Bonobo ~ Kong

Sturgill Simpson ~ It Ain't All Flowers
Bonobo ~ We Could Forever

A very daring pizza night

cauliflower crust
tomato sauce & tomatoes
arugula
almond milk mozzarella

Lyrical

From "Neptune":

"So if you won't hold me
I have no objections
So if you won't please me
I make no commands
So if you don't trust me
It's best if I drown"

~ S. Stevens


Neptune

From the desk...

Of Natalie Portman:

 "Some people have been calling this movement Puritanical...To these people I want to say: The current system is Puritanical. Maybe men can say and do whatever they want, but women cannot. The current system inhibits women from expressing our desires, wants and needs, from seeking our pleasure. Let me tell you about my own experience: I turned 12 on the set of my first film, The Professional..."
  ~ https://medium.com/@natalieportman/that-obscure-subject-of-desire-f2e2bd09db8c

I feel something good

It's like a flower shawl.
Healing energy.
:*)

Oh interesting about $$$

Trump is replacing Janet Yellen, the woman responsible for the economy he’s so proud of

Watched this yesterday

Aly Raisman talking to a serial abuser who was excused by his colleagues for years and years.

https://deadspin.com/aly-raisman-is-ready-to-burn-it-all-down-1822234455

Here is another.

https://deadspin.com/mckayla-maroney-knew-she-had-to-stick-up-for-herself-1819659056

What is heaven these days?

It's a moment on a blanket in a park, looking up at the tops of trees and the sky.

How close is it

This article says homelessness has gone up 75% in 6 years. 

~ http://www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la-me-homeless-how-we-got-here-20180201-story.html

I want to move

I have put down bay leave on shelves because of them. My whole life, I have lived in different apartments and I did not have to deal with roaches, but here I have to deal with them. I wasn't poor growing up, and never dealt with them anywhere I lived as an adult either. I don't understand how I came to be stuck in this situation. This apartment is not cheap, either, but in this area the rent is high. I know now that when you move into a place, the cleanliness of previous tenants matters. But I have paid down a lot of debt this year, so I do feel better about that. That's what is great now...depositing half the paycheck to pay down debt you accrued when the economy was bad. Another great thing is every day that is free of various horrible health symptoms. And the neighbors are not so loud now. Why don't I just move? Sometimes I ask myself this. Because there are people on another coast who would take me in. Even if there is a person there with whom I disagree politically, he still has said that I should move there, and when I had problems traveling, he said that it was God's way of telling me I should move there. They have a nice house and I could go to the beach all the time. But then, what about health insurance? What about the problems that exist for half the month and not so much at other times? It's just very interesting to be in this particular situation. It seems like I am encountering what other people I knew had to encounter as children (like my friend who left but I still think she's coming back...)

And I like light happy things too.

At the library, my friend's book was next to An Angel At My Table and I thought oh that is appropriate. I like light happy things, too, but it's like I have no choice, and I do want to have more choice, so I will revise that. Within the framework of "I have no choice but to see what others choose not to see," I still have some choice. I wasn't born this way.

Do your laundry

Yeah okay Uranus

Chocolate tonight

Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Chocolate tonight Quel poeme

Sometimes it's like I know

A person tires of unbearable sadness and heartache.

Creativity can do something for that sometimes.

How can a conversation that happened in Wegman's parking lot be a long time ago? It could be yesterday, for God's sakes.

And then, even being a kid riding in the back of a car seems strangely close to the present.

Surprisingly what's the word

Quotable at any rate.

"If 'Lolita' explores a middle-aged man's twisted but heartfelt passion for a young girl, 'Roger Fishbite' works as black comedy, portraying an indifferent society that destroys its own children. Never is Lucky more affecting than when she lets down her guard and acts like the kid she is. Of her sordid adventures with Fishbite, she writes: 'I had not yet reached the age when doing wrong excited me. I'd rather have gone back to school and gotten A's. I was beginning to do well at geometry and, frankly, I missed it.'"

~  https://www.salon.com/1999/04/14/prager/

It was so weird

To be reading this in a park

https://www.newsday.com/talking-with-emily-prager-madame-butterfly-1.285558

while bass-laden music blared out of a slow-moving automobile

Dear Lord

This is a problem.

"She said gymnasts, dancers and figure skaters were pressured to be 'pure, innocent, perfect' while simultaneously being sexualized at an age where they did not understand the concept. "

"She cited pressure to engage in unhealthy dieting, crude comments about their bodies and 'creepy men towering over us.'"

"'Our bodies did not belong to us. Our experiences, physical and emotional, were constantly invalidated. You learned early on not to question authority.'"

~ http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/international/ct-larry-nassar-john-geddert-twistars-20180202-story.html

In touch with The Lord

"Sometimes I ask 'who am I to judge?' Then I hear The Lord remind me who I am, and all is well."

https://twitter.com/PearlsFromMyrna/status/958434708743864320?s=17

Holy Saturday

In the morning I made some very healthy food and fed an ailing person and it was really great. I also cleaned the house a bit and admired the cat. Then I was alone in the house and somehow the hours got eaten up by depression and a nap. It is not that any one person's "fault," it is just that the feeling of loss has a way of coming back. I am going to take my sad but surviving self out to a nature space before the sun goes down "Well we all shine on..." ("Instant Karma")

some pretty things

march will be march

oh its jyst that existential ache again

Oh, that exasperating literary situation

When your interest is so, so piqued after a review...

http://lithub.com/the-day-virginia-woolf-brought-her-mom-back-to-life/

And you want to make the discovery, but you still struggle to read her actual work...AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Literature is hard.

"Some books have to wait until you're ready for them."

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2002/sep/07/classics.margaretatwood

This has been easier....Virginia Woolf got the flu in January, this book said.

https://www.npr.org/2017/07/25/537085202/the-world-broke-in-two-four-writers-one-transformational-year


The Scream by Sebastian Cosor and Cosmin Sirbulescu

Also, have a sound bath

There were large crystal bowls there.

https://www.yogajournal.com/lifestyle/crystal-singing-bowls

Cleansing Healing Crystal Singing Bowls

Please do the pigeon pose

I went to a yoga session where the teacher started us off stretching to "And waaay dooown we go" and "The Streets Of Philadelphia."



Bruce Springsteen ~ Streets of Philidelphia

Ah, melancholy yoga!!!

She also said she was trying to watch her mouth, said "put your hands by your buns," made fun of  herself, gave up and said "ass."

And "Gentlemen, I am sorry, but for this part we usually say point your feet towards your vagina."

Fell in love with the pigeon pose.

Well, there are a lot of versions. I think it was this one:

https://www.yogajournal.com/poses/master-sleeping-pigeon-pose-4-steps

So much dopamine.