At about this time yesterday morning someone set off a kind of panic alarm. It sounded so awful, distressing. It was not normal sirens.
I don't know who did it or why.
Eventually "normal" (like police or firetruck) sirens came and then abnormal siren also went away.
Pain and depression and going to sleep again...
Devalued because of the body you were born in...
(I had a worry about something going on with my body again. But that's not anything terribly new.)
Women I spoke with recently said the year started off so positive and now it feels really dreary...It was enragingly dreary because it feels like people let abusiveness take over.
It's hard to explain a feeling, as if you know other women who could have helped you and they chose not to do so.Why didn't they? Fear, I think. Some went along with whatever their husbands wanted, just to be safe. This has happened before. They told themselves certain things to justify what they did or did not do. They just went along with societal expectations.
Feeling like you've been dehumanized or oppressed by social systems is hard to explain. It's hard to describe it...and even if you find someone to listen...That person might just be like someone at the side of someone suffering...or at the side of someone giving birth...or at the side of someone dying...
